My mom has aIzhiehmer/dementia, I have power of attorney but seem to get no where with it. I have been talking to adult protective service, attorney's, police, no one can seem to help me. I cannot afford conservatorship and my brother has taken over her checking account and put his wife's name on my moms bank acct. My brother is a methadone user n I believe is still using heroine. They do not let me have any contact with my mom, I feel they have brain washed my mom they r always telling her horrible things about me, they told my mom I called the cops on her and that I called ADPS on my mom and now my mom is upset with me, I called police on my brother for threats he made to me n my family if I try to go get my mom. Theres so much more to this story I feel trapped and lost, I have always been very close to my mom and always a part of her life. He has never really been much in her life for the past 15/20 yrs and now that she has memory loss he has come to take her, my children and grandkids r so emotionally hurt over all this, they are very close to my mom. My mom has been gone now for 6 months n her weight had declined tremendously and now she is going blind in one eye. Pleading for HELP!
How did it come about that your brother removed your mother to New Mexico? Where was she living? Where were you when this happened?
If you are isolated from her mother, how are you obtaining information about her state of health?
If this is such a clear-cut case of abduction of a vulnerable elderly person by a methadone user, how did the police and APS explain their inability to act?
You say there is a great deal more to this story. Indeed. Could you explain a little more, please?
She's been gone six months. If you're not allowed contact how do you know all this?
If you have POA an original copy should be/have been deposited with her bank so no-one else can touch anything.
With all due respect I smell a troll.
Your POA does mean something, how was your brother able to take her out of state? How do you know that his wife's name is on your mother's bank account? some people feel self-entitled.
Is your mothers legal address/home in your state? Petition the court with your POA on behalf of your mother and ask the court if you could be appointed the person to take care of her, she could have enough dementia, that everyday she thinks, she is on her second day there and may not be realizing, that her money is being spent,she is not returning home... or for that matter even in a good place!!!!
1) It is highly probable that your mom already signed a new POA with your brother, which technically makes yours invalid. It is very easy to print the form, have the confused person sign and obtain notarized signatures. Done...new POA. Each of my siblings has a different POA naming him/her self as POA. Institutions don't know there are six POA's floating around, or which is the most recent. Which is the real one???? Not sure it matters because it could change again tomorrow. According to my Elder Attorney, there is no clear cut answer and it would be up to a judge to decide should someone pursue the matter in court.
2) POA does not take effect until the person is declared incompetent. Only a judge can deem a person incompetent, and it must be proven in court by medical professionals. My parents both have severe dementia and don't know which way is up. They have never been deemed legally incompetent and are still able to "make their own decisions," although their "decisions" are based solely on which child is influencing them at that particular moment.
3) Any adult who is 25, 55 or 105 who has not been deemed legally incompetent by a judge in a court of law can "do as they please" without anyone else's permission. It doesn't matter if the person has gray hair or can't remember their own name. If your mom willingly left town with your brother it is not considered an abduction, and if she added him or his wife to her bank account that is not a crime either and there is no crime for police to solve.
I have asked my attorney dozens of questions about who is the real POA, Couldn't it be easily proven that my parents were not of sound mind when they made certain decisions. etc. The answer is always the same: "It would be up to the judge."
That is how bad people take advantage of confused old people. Your best bet is to contact Adult Protective Services for advise. If they can get you in a room alone with your mom, and she says she wants to go home with you, your brother will have to comply. If they find she is being neglected or abused they can take action. If not, you need to hire an attorney to pursue legal guardianship and a judge will decide. If your brother has no money and has a criminal record he probably will not contest and you will not have to go through an expensive court battle. It would be worth an attorney just to file and see what happens.
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