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After a couple of difficult weeks, a trip to the ER, we stopped the med. MD seems to be treating this as Alzheimer's. NP who gave us diagnosis seemed to know nothing about types of dementia, but told us this wasn't related to Alzheimer's. Then for info, she gave me 2 books on Alzheimer's. Meeting with soc worker this week for more info (supposedly skilled in memory loss issues) maybe will help. After comparing side effects listed to moms symptoms, I immediately took her off Namenda. She had some of the worst ones. Don't know what to do for her. I'm scared and overwhelmed with stuff that needs to be done, dealing with my own health issues (breast cancer, depression and anxiety, etc), I get very little support from sibs. I am getting a 3-week vacation in Sept, covered by 2 sisters and 1 bro. Oldest sister (retired with no extraordinary responsibilities), informed me that she won't be available for respite till after June, 2015, as she's planning her daughter's wedding. As my primary backup, that leaves me with no hope of another break till then. Mom gets worse and sibs seem to step further back. I'm watching her decline physically & emotionally and it breaks my heart to have so little support. Getting some HHA help soon from ofc for aging, that will be a help, but I'm losing myself and my mom in the struggle. Can't leave mom alone since she's so afraid, so she goes with me everywhere. No privacy, and she's cut off some of her best long time friends. Need support, but don't know where to get it. Any suggestions?

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What kind of MD is she seeing? Can you find a geriatric psychiatrist to work on HER anxiety? Sometimes with elders, this can be a try and try again process, but worth it in the end. Are YOU being treated for your depression and anxiety?


Think about it this way. What would happen if you dropped dead of a heart attack tomorrow? 30 per cent of caregivers die before their charges do. My aunt did. My uncle lived quite happily in memory care for another two years. Life lesson. Learned the hard way.
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She's seeing a neurologist for the dementia (seen once, only to order a MRI). Also sees a geriatric primary doc for anxiety and other issues. Taking small dose of clonazepam, but it makes her sleep most of the day. I, too, am being treated for depression and anxiety. Have been for years, on SS Disability because of it. It's been very helpful until the last year.
Thanks for responding so quickly.
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