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Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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The smarty- pants answer would be to say “duck!”, but I know what you mean. There are no rules for understanding someone with dementia and you can’t predict what they will do next. You can ask them if they know they almost brained you with a bedpan and you’ll just get a blank look or they’ll blame it on someone else who might or might not really exist. If my mom didn’t like something, it would come flying out her door. We finally started keeping her door partway closed so she didn’t injure anyone coming down the hall in the facility.
I don’t recognize your user name, but if you are new to this site, welcome, and stick around. You’ll learn a lot here. Mostly that there’s no road map for the journey of dementia. It’s different for everyone and you take the journey day by day.
I would say however, to do what I did. I removed all heirlooms and breakable things from Mom’s room. I took away scissors and nail files. She got no knives with meals. That way, if she did throw something, it could make a mess but not injure her or anyone else.
Calm and comfort her. She must have been very angry and distressed to have that reaction. Her violent reaction may even scare her. Make her feel safe. You don't need to talk about the throwing things or the tantrum.
Teepa Snow trains professional caregivers to deal with many aspects of dementia. Many short videos of her lessons are on youtube. She gets into specific detail, such as where to stand when talking to them (next to them, on their dominant side), how to hold their hand, etc. Find a few of them on diffusing anger, and see what you think.
I can tell you what the pros in a facility would do - they would have a meeting to discuss why the person is so agitated and try to come up with strategies to alleviate that. Common causes of agitation include....
Pain and discomfort from sitting in the same position, illness or injury
Changes in environment or routine
Overstimulation
Lack of sleep
Hunger or thirst
Loneliness
Medications that can cause aggression and agitation
Is there a reason why you want this person to remember what they just did? So that they will apologize to you for their behavior? So that you can "discuss" their behavior with them in the hopes that the behavior will stop?
The Teepa Snow videos about dealing with dementia mentioned by jeannegibbs are a good source of information.
And you might consider looking for possible causes of agitation (See cwillie's list of common causes of agitation) and then determine if there is something that you can do to decrease the agitation by changing how you act before the tantrum occurs.
I think perhaps you might try saying: "I understand that you are angry. We all get angry sometimes and it is okay. Can you tell me why you are angry?" I have been surprised many times by getting an answer! And one that made sense and had a simple solution.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I don’t recognize your user name, but if you are new to this site, welcome, and stick around. You’ll learn a lot here. Mostly that there’s no road map for the journey of dementia. It’s different for everyone and you take the journey day by day.
I would say however, to do what I did. I removed all heirlooms and breakable things from Mom’s room. I took away scissors and nail files. She got no knives with meals. That way, if she did throw something, it could make a mess but not injure her or anyone else.
Teepa Snow trains professional caregivers to deal with many aspects of dementia. Many short videos of her lessons are on youtube. She gets into specific detail, such as where to stand when talking to them (next to them, on their dominant side), how to hold their hand, etc. Find a few of them on diffusing anger, and see what you think.
Pain and discomfort from sitting in the same position, illness or injury
Changes in environment or routine
Overstimulation
Lack of sleep
Hunger or thirst
Loneliness
Medications that can cause aggression and agitation
Being too cool or warm
Impending medical procedures
Poor communication
Routine disruptions
Poor lighting
The Teepa Snow videos about dealing with dementia mentioned by jeannegibbs are a good source of information.
And you might consider looking for possible causes of agitation (See cwillie's list of common causes of agitation) and then determine if there is something that you can do to decrease the agitation by changing how you act before the tantrum occurs.