At 93, mom cannot do her checkbook. Almost blind. We Started utilizing financial POA, and wow! after one month she demanded everything back.
She withdrew most money from her checking, call us thieves, and said she was going to put her -"living out of the state" niece on her account, and hide assets from her children. This is an account that her Soc sec goes into and we paid her bills and utilities from. She is not thinking clearly, but listens to outsiders causing us turmoil in trying to care for her. She said we are mean, yet forgets we put in a new furnace, plumbing, and a chairlift for her , due to her immobility issues... all at our own expense, to keep her in her home.
Is this niece?
Were you keeping meticulous records of every penny in and every penny out as is your fiduciary duty?
You may need to consider diagnosis, doctor's letters and guardianship if your Mom is at risk from anyone manipulating her money.
Unfortunately, unless she is evaluated and deemed incompetent to manage her own affairs, she can legally do all of the things you mention. If you try to keep her away from her money, you could land yourself in legal hot water, because again...as long as she's legally competent, it is HER money to treat as she wants.
By way of practical suggestions: as long as you have POA documentation backing you up, you could still talk to companies in her stead and check that her bills are paid. Do you have access to any of her online accounts? Can you log into them and check that her necessary bills are paid (utilities, medical, housing, all the important stuff?) If she never set up online accounts for those things, do you have enough information that YOU can do that in her stead and then monitor those bills from afar without provoking her? Could you get her to agree to set up automatic payments (making clear to her that she NEEDS to leave her money in her account so the bills will be paid?) Without access to her money, of course you then would need to decide how to help if she gets behind, but at least you'd know. Can you rustle up some others she trusts to mediate for you - reassure her you're working in her best interest, or blunt the effects of the troublemaking outsiders? And, of course, the long game - you could always look for opportunities to have her evaluated for cognitive decline (if she needs to go to the hospital for anything, for instance), and if she is deemed incompetent, then her POAs have a leg to stand on in taking over her finances more permanently.
That last may not end well, and it sounds like she may not be happy about it ever, but...if that's what needs to happen, it's better than her not being financially safe or cared for. Sometimes there's no easy answers. Best wishes and good luck.
With all her health problems there is no way she can handle her own finances. You say We when mentioning POA. There should only be one person handling financial and medical with back ups. Do you keep Mom in the loop. Having her sit with you why you pay her bills? Are too many people coming at her.
She is losing her independence. She is hard of hearing and can't see well. Maybe sit down and ask her what she wants. Then nicely tell her, but Mom you can't fill out checks because you can't see well enough to write. How about I fill them out and you sign them.