Dad is eating very little. Complains of headaches and body pain all the time. Wants to go to hospital but they can’t find anything wrong except that he is 95 and anemic. He wants more attention than I can provide. Can I insist a nursing home admit him?
What's causing the anaemia? If it's severe, it might well make him feel dreadful.
If dad couldn’t pass these two portals, he might be eligible for an Assisted Living Facility where he could get additional services as required until his health reached the point of requiring 24/7 care in a NH or hospice.
Does your dad see a doctor or only visit ERs? If he could find a geriatrician that might help him feel heard and cared for.
Has he seen a hematologist? I suspect your dad just wants to feel better and that should be an achievable goal.
He could qualify for hospice now, it could start in your home and you could decide if it was enough extra help. The focus of hospice being to keep him comfortable and not seek cures for the qualifying malady. People sometimes live many years on hospice. He could have hospice almost anywhere, in your home, in an ALF, in a NH. This care might help relieve some of his anxiety.
Do try to get help for yourself as well. It’s very hard what you are doing.
edit: whoops I just noticed this is a month old post.