How long does it typically take to set up 24/7 home care?
My mom is in rehab after a stroke. Her discharge date is coming up and she wants to be at home instead of in a facility. (I would vastly prefer a facility, but she completely refuses to be in one, so we're trying this first.) I know the rehab isn't going to discharge her until we have a safe place arranged. I have not begun to set up home care yet and am not even sure where to begin. I'd have to get her a hospital bed as well as set up a place for the nighttime worker to sleep in my mom's large one-bedroom apt. I realize there is no standard amount of time that all this will take,that it varies from person to person, but given that I have a f/t job, are we likely looking at a couple of weeks or longer? My mom is BEGGING me to get her out of the rehab asap and I keep telling her it will take some time to set things up at her home.
When my Dad had around the clock care due to him being a fall risk because of all the stairs in him home, it was costing him over $20k per month, yes per month, not counting the cost of maintaining a large home, groceries, yard work, etc. If he had continued that route it would have cost him $240k per year on just care alone.
Since your Mom refuses to go to a facility [which is common for those elders who are much older as they don't realize that today's facilities are much nicer then what they might have seen back a half century ago], you would need to set up her condo like it was a nursing home.
You already have on your list a hospital bed. What about bathroom needs? Is your Mom able to walk on her own to use the bathroom? Would she need a potty chair in her room. Would she need someone to lift her from the bed to a wheelchair to the toilet? Would someone be able to lift her? Her bathroom might need grab bars on the walls, the landlord would need to have someone install those. Put on your list a shower chair, and toilet bars if Mom has trouble getting up off of the toilet. What a about a wheelchair? Would it be able to go through the door openings?
If you hire a caregiver who is not from an Agency, then you Mom would need to add a "workman's comp" rider to her renter's insurance, this rider is needed in case a caregiver gets hurt on the job [back injuries are the norm]. If hired from an Agency, the Agency is usually licensed, bonded, insured, and have their own workman comp rider.
Oh my gosh, there is so much to think about.
My big question is, what do the discharge folks say? Are they helping you set up home care? As i posted previously, the doc has to script all this (services, hospital bed, therapy) in order for it to happen.
How is mom's grocery shopping going to get done? Is she going to accept Meals on Wheels? Is she going to be cranky hecause the aide doesn't cook the way she's used to? How will she get to Doctor appointments? Has she been using Access a Ride, or does that need to be set up?
I think the chances of home care working depend a lot on how flexible your mom is willing to be about a lot of issues. And frankly, she doesn't sound very flexible.
If you haven't already, make an appointment to sit diwn with the social worker at the facility to get an idea of what YOU need to arrange, which agencies to call, etc. Also, talk to the SW in your mom's complex and see what she suggests. She almost certainly knows which agencies already have aides working there,who is reliable and what resources you can access.
You sound like a wonderful daug hter and your mom is VERY lucky to have you in her corner. And i do understand that mom wants to go home. My elderly friend was the same way, and the three of us ( my ex, his wife and to a very minor extent I) were able to make it happen. But frankly, it was Heck on wheels.
The other question, of course, is how mom is going to pay for home care. It's about $25 per hour. Until Medicaid gets approved, i guess she is going to have to pay privately. So each day would be $600 or 4200 per week. (That's the way I'd present it to her).
The thing that took a LONG time to sink in for us? The fact that mom WANTED something didn't mean it could be done, or that it was the best thing for her. And sometimes, rather than pushing back, you just have to let that sink in, both for you and for mom.
What kind of trust was set up?
If there were no other option, then mother might be better able to accept the idea of the NH. Have you considered that her expectations are unreasonable? With you working full time, it sounds very involved and very expensive for her to come home. Many people cannot afford in-home, around the clock outside help come into the home.
I recall that my cousin was completely convinced that she could live at home with the help of neighbors, but in reality, she was not able to prepare food, use her telephone, stove, washer or bathe on her own. Her expectations were just not based on reality.
The ability does not always match the belief the senior may have. I think I might have a NH lined up, just in case she needs to be admitted there quickly. Keep in mind that she'll have to get her Medicaid application in and approved if she will be relying on it for the costs.
If you don't want to be the person who tells mom that it's not feasible for her to come home right away, then why not have the social worker or whoever is in charge of her discharge do it? When they learn that no one is there to provide around the clock care yet, they can figure it out and tell her what the truth is.
"If time is an issue for setting up all of the home care, then I can't imagine how much more time supervising how things are going on in her home, once she arrives would be." Sunnygirl1 Exactly. Sounds like your mother would be complaining about the caregivers. And, as someone already mentioned, you will be on the hook if someone doesn't show up.
Now's your best time to act, since your mother is in rehab. If you go against your mother's wishes (facility for her), what is the worst that can happen? I can well figure out what the worst will be if you DO NOT keep her in a facility.
My Aunt and Uncle, he with dementia and she with advanced heart disease and mobility problems, stayed at home successully with 24/7 aides until my aunt died. But they were millionaires.
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