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I have a sick (dementia) 54 year old woman living in my house. In 2021, she stopped talking, does not eat on her own, hardly walks, does not understand anyone .. sleeps poorly at night. sometimes she fights .. one person cannot put her on the toilet, since when taking off her clothes, she does not give in .. she lets go on the floor .. therefore, one person needs to hold her (face to face), and the second person takes off her "clothes" ., also take bath procedures. Also needs to be near her all the time, she suddenly gets up and wants to go, but since she quickly gets dizzy and can fall... Tell me please, how much will it cost to care 24 hour (at home) for such a sick woman?

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Have you called 911 or taken her to the ER? If you're not her PoA then you need to report her to APS so she can get appropriate care. She needs to be assigned a legal guardian.

At 54 if she has dementia it is ALZ or wet brain. Take her to the ER and explain she's a renter and that you're not her caregiver and that she's an "unsafe discharge".
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Isthisrealyreal Aug 19, 2024
There you go with your diagnosis again. That is just plain dangerous and NOT what this forum is about.
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This woman needs to be in a nursing facility where she will receive the 24/7 care she now requires.
The cost for this kind of in-home care would be cost prohibited.
Like already suggested, please call 911 and have her taken to the ER, and once there, refuse to take her back home telling the hospital social worker and doctors that she is an unsafe discharge and that she has no one to care for her.
They will then have to find placement for her.
She needs to be out of your home sooner than later so please call 911 today.
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irimesku Aug 19, 2024
I'm not sure you understood my question. We don't want this woman to come true! She's a person, not a kitten.
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We are not an Care agency. Just Caregivers sharing our own experiences on a forum.

This woman needs more help than you seem to be able to give her. If she is not related to you I am wondering why you continue to care for her. Aides are $15 to $20 an hr. Even if related, I personally would not be taking care of this person. Call APS and tell them you cannot care for this woman any longer. Or send her to ER refusing to take her back to your home.
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irimesku Aug 19, 2024
Yes, I understand, this is a forum. I am only interested in one thing: is there anyone on this forum who knows approximately how much it costs per hour to care for a patient like I described earlier..? The patient and I are not related.. her husband just abandoned... the situation is not simple, and at the same time very long.. it would take a long time to tell..but my wife and I don’t want to give her away anywhere... she’ll just die if we leave her..and we feel very sorry for her.
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Home care in my area started at $23/hour. Multiply that for 24/7 care, and you are looking at over 200 grand a year just to keep her at home. And skilled nursing care will be much more expensive.

I agree with the others. She needs to go into an AL facility. She will get much better care for less money.
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You are dealing with a 2 person assist, that is skilled nursing level of care required.

That means it is cost prohibitive to try and do this in home.
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I think you may be under the mistaken impression this is a place where you hire caregivers?
It is not. That would be someplace like Visiting Angels, Care.com, and etc. We are only a Forum of Caregivers.

You tell us that you have someone in mid 50s with diagnosed dementia. It isn't clear what relation this person is to you or if you are this person's POA. It sounds as though this person needs way too much care for care in the home, and should likely be placed where it is possible to get 24/7 care from a staff.

More information may help. Wishing you the very best.
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irimesku Aug 19, 2024
Yes, I understand, this is a forum. I am only interested in one thing: is there anyone on this forum who knows approximately how much it costs per hour to care for a patient like I described earlier..? The patient and I are not related.. her husband just abandoned... the situation is not simple, and at the same time very long.. and it would take a long time to tell.
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This is your wife , I'm understanding? Only 54 , oh my I am so deeply sorry.

It will cost a lot. I did some home care, that alone is about 25 dollars an hour , from a company, private might be less. But when I did home care and a client was declining this badly I would call the company and tell them I can't go there anymore, I wasn't about to risk hurting myself for a job. So I think it's going to cost more .

I have no clue on your financial situation but I do believe if your wife was of sound mind she wouldn't want you to risk everything for her well-being.

As a wife with a sound mind, I would tell my husbands to put me in a nursing home, visit me but don't ruin your life, health, and fiance over me

Again I'm so sorry 😞
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Anxietynacy Aug 19, 2024
Oh I'm sorry, was reading more, of your replies, this is not your wife, a family friend, bless your heart ❤️
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Go to Care.com and look and see how much it is. Or call an agency to ask. You'll need 2 caregivers to lift this woman up, not one. Nobody is going to risk a back injury to lift a combative woman onto the toilet or into the shower, trust me on that. You'll need 2 shifts of 2 caregivers as well each day. You have no profile info, so we don't know what state you live in. Care in California is more expensive than in Mississippi.

Good luck calling agencies in your area to find the info you need.
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Are you POA for this person? Who is Health POA and Financial POA?
Is she paying you to care for her?
Is she paying you rent and her fair share of ALL household expenses?
Oh, and this is not an agency, this is a Forum of Caregivers and the participants are from all over.
What it will cost you is greatly dependent upon where you live, and the type of care this person needs. Your best bet is to contact several agencies and let them evaluate this person as to the type of care she needs.

I also suggest that you get the other things I mentioned sorted out.
I read so many posts of people that never got paid, they wait until the person dies in hopes that the family will pay them, give them the house that was promised and all such matters of compensation.
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Cost varies by location. You can see 2023 rates surveyed by Genworth for the US at

https://www.genworth.com/aging-and-you/finances/cost-of-care

Average was $33.00 an hour. If she really needs two people at a time, all the time, there’s no way anyone but the top .1% can afford to pay for it, especially since the early onset means it could go on for decades.

My back of a napkin estimate, is about $15,000,000 for just the caregivers for the rest of her life. (33x2x24x365.25x25) If this kind of money is a real possibility, don’t skimp on good professional legal/medical/financial advice.
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A big heart is wonderful.

But a Village of helpers becomes necessary. Villagers that are patient, kind, that add joy, those with the strength to roll people, transfer & use lifting machines, those with the management skill to run all the services & staff.

When you take on a *mission* as a *lone caregiver* it can become lonely real quick. Lonely. Too heavy - physically & emotionally.
You burn out.

Ask yourself WHY you have taken on this *mission*? You & your Wife, right?

I took this from your reply;

"wife and I don’t want to give her away anywhere... she’ll just die if we leave her..and we feel very sorry for her"

Unpack all that.
LOOK at your language you use.
I notice straight off it contains many FEELINGS & assumptions.

"don't want to give her away"
You are SAD, OK. Maybe fearful too.
"she'll just die if we leave her.."
Really? Why do you say this?
Would you leave her alone? Or in a NH/group home/care facility?
"..feel sorry for her".
Sadness again. OK.

Welcome to the forum. You are reaching out for the wider community, looking for others to help, looking for the *Villagers*.

Well done. Keep going. Find them.
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Reply to Beatty
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You are going to need to contact home care agencies in your area to get accurate information. It seems she may need more than just basic assistance. I would estimate about $600-$800 a day, but it may be more expensive if she needs more intensive care. Good Luck!
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At home caregivers will be 200 to 250k a year and a SNF can be 140K. However there is such a thing as Medicaid which will take her in a semi private room. If she is a 2 person assist, no caregivers can help unless you are present.
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Two aides to attend to her 24/7 would be 250k a year minimum in California. And if she or you don’t have this kind of money, the only choice you have is to call 911 when her behaviors start up so that we the taxpayers can fund her being in some home where two people diaper her at intervals, bathe her and feed her. You can go visit and hear about how she hates it, but her minimal needs will be met.
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Igloocar Oct 12, 2024
PeggySue, you are usually much kinder in your replies! Are you objecting to the need for residential Medicaid for some people--many of whom have helped fund Medicaid themselves through their own taxes.? Also, you didn't notice that this woman no longer talks: she will not be complaining to these very caring friends about whatever they do to help her. What they are having difficulty understanding is that her current situation cannot work for her or for them!
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As others have mentioned, if she is a 2-person assist, you will not be able to get home health care for her. In addition, while a transition to a facility may initially be traumatic, in a short time she will likely not remember that she has been moved. She will get better health care than you can give her, much as you care for her. Assuming you place her fairly nearby, you can visit her often, and things will be more pleasant for her and for both you and your spouse because you will no longer be involved with physical struggles with her.
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This post is from August and the OP has not returned since her initial question. She just kept replying the same thing. She needed to know exactly what a caregiver is paid in her area of the county. We could not answer that.
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Beatty, she is only 54. Unless she has Social Security Disability or a few particular diseases, she is unfortunately too young for Medicare
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