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My dad is in a nursing home that isn’t giving him the proper care (not bathing, wrong meds, not providing PT), which is causing him to have atrophy in his legs from not getting out of bed. My mom has been fighting with the nursing home because they’re saying to leave would be against medical advice, but keeping him there is dangerous. Her insurance won’t pay for him to stay there, but says he shouldn’t go home. Now everything is out of pocket because no one will help her. She found an aide to assist at home and his doctor will get PT ordered, but the nursing home won’t call an ambulance to take him home and the ambulance won’t come unless the nursing home requests one. She doesn’t know what to do.


Is it possible to transfer Dad to another nursing home if he isn’t receiving the proper care? He really needs intense therapy in a nursing home, but the current facility is only hurting him since they refuse to do therapy.


Should she find a lawyer? They have shown signs of neglect and are now basically holding him hostage, leaving her with a 10k+ bill. I think they are taking advantage of her.


Looking for some advice! Much appreciated!

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Assuming that you are in the U.S., my first step would be to get in touch with the ombudsman in your state/county. This will at least start a paper trail. Document everything. Keep a list of his medications, because they will probably not provide you with one should he decide to leave AMA. If you are successful in getting him out of there, keep his doctor apprised of the meds he has been getting so he can continue care at home if his doctor thinks the meds are appropriate.

Secondly, you could possibly arrange your own medical transport through a private service. Is he able to sit up in a wheelchair? What we ended up doing for my mom was renting a wheelchair accessible van and taking her in that.

If you wish to transfer him to a different nursing home for PT, here is a website where you can compare the ratings given to them by Medicare.
https://www.medicare.gov/care-compare/?providerType=NursingHome&redirect=true

Best of luck
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Call the transport yourself. They can't hold him hostage. That's kidnapping.

Frankly, I wouldn't waste the time or money to sue because it'd take years and cost a fortune with little chance of you getting any satisfaction. Instead, keep meticulous records of his treatment and file a complaint with the state agency that regulates that place.
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Your concerns are, yes, best addressed by an attorney. No one here can have a clear understanding of your situation. I wish you well.
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Um. Very respectfully, are you getting this information only from your mother?

God knows the systems are a maze and hard for anyone to work out, but all the same there are one or two points in your account that are so Kafkaesque that they actually seem... improbable. E.g. the insurance won't pay this SNF, so which ones do they approve? Or, if they dispute that your father needs skilled nursing at all, would they like to tell that to whoever's telling your mother about the AMA issue? The ambulance service won't come unless the SNF calls them, but the SNF won't call an ambulance (- so use a different service, no?).

It all just sounds very chaotic, as though coming from someone who is stressed to the point of being overwhelmed and therefore finding it difficult to understand what she's being told (especially if it's told to her in Jargonese by someone who just wants to get her off the phone).

Before you call a lawyer, I should ask your mother's permission to speak to someone in charge yourself and just check what is going on.
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In order to sue the nursing home you have to collect objective evidence of negligence. With accurate descriptions of each incidente, time, date and staff member involved. Next, you have to prove that such negligence has caused an irreparable damage to the patient.
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AlvaDeer Apr 2022
Yes. And so much more. In other words, it won't happen. I agree.
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