My mother came down with severe Bronchitis, and then it became pneumonia. She was admitted to the hospital on a Friday. On the following Wednesday she went into a nursing home for Rehab because she wasn't better. She will be in rehab for three weeks. She has been in the home now for one week. I go visit her every night. I've observed that it does appear that she is getting "a little better physically", HOWEVER, mentally she is much much worse. My mother does have Dementia. She is 92 years old. Mentally she just seems more and more out of it now. Her short term memory is totally shot. Her skin tone has a grayness to it. Her eyes have this blank, no one there look to them. Three nights ago she told me that she had been in that home for a month....she has only been there a week. I just don't understand why her mental state has deteriorated so much since she has been in this home for rehabilitation. She put her spoon in her soup upside down the other night, and she seemed utterly confused as to how to make it right. What do you all think of this?
I've come the the conclusion that hospital and rehab is extremely draining for those with dementia. However, they can recover once back at "home". I hope this happens to your loved one too. If all blood tests come out OK, then please just help her get comfortable again once released.
The atmosphere is dry, tissues (especially nasal and mouth ones) dry up and the person becomes uncomfortable, often very, very uncomfortable.
Then there's another change at rehab, where everything is done for them - there's not much choice when to get up, when to get therapy. You live by a facility's schedule.
If there's some dementia involved, the change can be even more startling. I often wonder if people in that situation could articulate the confusion and would say that their lives have literally been taken over by strangers.
There are a few things you could try. Is there anyone, or can you, visit during the day, to help create a more personalized atmosphere? If so, can someone bring a CD or some type of portable device to play her favorite music? Even a portable radio could help. If she can relax, there's at least a possibility of lowered stress level.
Ask the staff for a calendar if one isn't posted in the room. Help orient her as to date, but also check the schedule and see when pet and music therapy are scheduled. Both are soothing, calming, and can help bring people "out of their shell".
Sometimes taking someone for a walk (or wheelchair roll) around the facility to see outdoors can help; viewing outside areas, especially lovely ones, in my experience helps people to relax, and reorient themselves.
I think the effort would be to try to stabilize her mental state as much as you can, help her relax and feel oriented, not overwhelmed by being in a strange surrounding, and become a little bit more comfortable to the point that it will help her recover and go home.
You might also want to begin researching either private duty or another place with higher level of care than she can get at home. Neither is an easy option to accept. I've found in my search for qualified private duty people that there are a lot of franchise operations with dubious management and staff. It was not an easy search or choice.
Assisted living or memory care would mean yet another move.
I don't want to frighten you, but perhaps your mother has reached that stage of tough decisions.
I’m happy to say that he out of there with visiting nurses and some follow up PT. It was quite an ordeal. He also lost 10 lbs because he wasn’t eating his normal meals in a dining hall with people that he knew.
Dimentia really wears you out. It’s tough. Hang in there. Thank God for support sites like this.
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