Hi there, Since I’ve become my mom’s care provider about 4 years ago, I’ve noticed how bad my memory has become. It started about 2 years ago, or so. Anyway, those close to me don’t think it’s a big deal; including my doctor. So where do I go now? Does anyone know what specific words I can use the next time I see the doc? Family & friends tell me it’s normal for this to happen after retirement because a person isn’t required to “be on the ball” like they were when they were working. I retired when I was 56, now I’m 62 and it’s frightening how bad my memory is! Any advice? I’d appreciate it. Thanks!
I wanted to go see my mom but health wise it didn’t work out and the family chaos also threw a monkey wrench in any plans.
But don’t be afraid you’re losing your faculties. Caring for ill people will put you in a brain fog. You feel as confused as the patient. But stop worrying about your faculties. Your nerves are probably shot too.
Xanax is not a good nerve medicine however; it causes memory loss. Blackouts even.
When I had to start getting up every couple of hours to help my DH void, I was staggering around the house worse than he was.
The fact you know you have a problem - means the problem probably isn't as bad as you fear. Start making notes, it helps a lot. And I haven't known what day it is since *forever* but life still continues.
Hang in there honey, it ain't just you.
Take care of yourself.
In the ten years I cared for my husband, I think I missed his pill doses twice. For myself, I miss pill doses at least twice a month. I missed trash pickup day a couple of times this winter. I never forgot mealtimes when I was taking care of Coy. I regularly get involved in something and keep going without stopping to eat.
I've never been good with names. I'm pretty hopeless now.
heysilky, what kinds of things are you forgetting? If you forget that Tuesday is trash pickup day, or you thought today was Monday, oh well. If you can't remember what a waste basket is or why there is one in your kitchen, that is considerably more concerning.
So you forget what day it is. Do you remember how to find out? Are you mostly forgetting facts (who is vice president?) or processes (how to I use this coffee maker?)
I suggest keeping track of things you forget (after you remember that you forgot them, of course.) so you can discuss it more specifically with your doctor.
Meanwhile, relax. Stress isn't good for you memory, you know!
What language are you trying to learn?
Thanks again...so much. This is a jewel of a forum
Doctors will blow you off. Absolutely and positively. But you know yourself better than anyone. If you are concerned, don't stop asking for help. Memory problems can be caused by lots of physical things that can be alleviated. Thyroid trouble, low B vitamins, dehydration, UTI...all can affect your memory. I find the Nurse Practitioners are more open to hearing my concerns without patting me on the head and sending me on my way.
If the doctor responds with some version of "I wouldn't worry about it", politely ask that they consider what else it could be besides nothing. Good luck.
Not a go go go vacation rather pick a water side place for long walks, a hammock in the sun, dinner out that is served nicely, a bottle or 2 of wine, close to a morning coffee shop that has speciality baked goods so good that you are picking tomorrow's before you leave, a spa day etc - you get the pix just relax & enjoy
If there are siblings then tell them[DON'T ASK] that you are going away & give them a choice of 2 or 3 time slots & if they can't accommodate then they pay for help so you can recharge - it will be good for you both - leave your cell phone at home too so that you are not on call continuously
I have a black zip binder/planner that I used a lot when my kids were in High School. I bought current pages for it but haven’t used it for a couple months. I just pulled it out. It’s a Franklin Covey.
My family has always called it MY BRAIN!
Of course if your memory problems have you worried absolutely find a Dr for an evaluation.
I just remembered something I will share.
My Mom was evaluated by a Geriatric Psychiatrist for a mood disorder after she had developed Dementia. There was a point that this Dr thought Mom might not have a true Dementia at all but a pseudo dementia caused by a Depressive Disorder.
Just thought I would throw that out there as another avenue you might want to explore.
I will admit that when I was trying to care for my LO with dementia, work full time, care for senior parents, etc. IT was VERY stressful. It caused me many health problems, in addition to playing havoc on my mental state. I was convinced that I had to have some kind of cognitive decline. I was so afraid. But, I got my physical health on back on track, got help for LO so, relief from caregiver overload and starting taking Coconut oil capsules (I know it sounds odd and isn't proven, but, it does help me. I take fish oil too.) And before too long I was feeling much better and even better than I had in many years. So, I was wrong about it.
I hope you can find your answers. I'd consider options though, because sometimes, it's just that you need respite.
For myself I've noticed a rapid decline in memory and yes while I do have a lot going on at the same time, this is much worse than normal. Just did a bunch of tests yesterday, and hoping this is more of a Thyroid problem than a blockage problem.
At any rate, I mentioned that I wanted to get a referral for the Cleveland Clinic, so that I could make an appointment, and the doctor was happy to comply - even agreeing that it would be a good idea. From everything I'm reading, both Alz and Dementia can be managed diseases, especially when caught before much of the brain damage has been done.