My wife of 56 years was diagnosed with MCI 18 months ago. Since then I have noticed a diminished interest in routine activities around our home. For example, she loved gardening and while she seems to notice things need to be done she rarely acts on them now. The new behaviors are sitting in a comfortable chair, reading and playing solitaire. She seems detached from the world she used to love. Is this new pattern part of the disease? We have a new neurological testing battery lined up next month. Thanks.
BeachWish
i noticed that in particular with my short term ... several months before they died ... terminally ill family members.
they were no longer even interested in looking out the window.
before that they were active outgoing people and all of a sudden they were totally uninterested.
I was surprised. It was totally unexpected.
According to this article about 15 to 20 percent of people 65 or over have MCI which is at higher risk of fulminating to Alzheimer's.
https://www.alz.org/alzheimers-dementia/what-is-dementia/related_conditions/mild-cognitive-impairment#:~:text=Mild%20cognitive%20impairment%20(MCI)%20causes,developing%20Alzheimer%27s%20or%20another%20dementia.
Age 56 is very young to have MCI. If she is not suffering clinical depression, she is at HIGH risk of getting AD. Now if she is on a lot of psychotropic medications or narcotics much increases the likelihood of AD as well.
I don't mean to sound depressing - but I've known several people with MCI, and it eventually progressed to dementia in all of them. So, one must prepare themselves for that possibility.
Perhaps if she comments about something needing to be done in the garden, if needs to be weeded for instance, you could suggest let’s weed it, then do it with her. Or at least start the process with her. You could suggest going the a nursery and buying new plants for the garden.
The point is, it’s not necessarily apathy, depression or disinterest on her part. This hit home for me when my mother wouldn’t shower or change out of her obviously dirty clothes. She kept waving people off and saying it wasn’t necessary, or she didn’t care, or it wasn’t important to her or sometimes a direct, “leave me alone”. I finally realized she was unable to sequence how to take a shower and dress herself. After warming up with a nice visit (she’s stubborn and doesn’t like to be told what to do!), I asked her if she doesn’t Want to shower, or if she doesn’t know How. She admitted she cannot really remember How to do it. That was a game changer. I told her I’d help her. I got her into the shower and stood back to see what she could do. She just stood there and couldn’t get started. So I helped by verbally prompting her to turn on the water, get the soap & wash cloth, put soap on the washcloth, and wash her face & neck. Once all that got going, she was able to continue washing the rest of herself, but that’s what it took to get her going. I think it felt kind of empowering to her that she could do as much as she could.
We often have to break things down into smaller steps for them. What seems like a simple task to us (how many times has an 84 year old woman independently showered herself?!) may be overwhelming or puzzling to them so they don’t want to do it at all. Even those with dementia recognize they cannot do what they used to be able to do, and want to avoid facing the sad fact.
Hope that helps, and good luck to you!
Is it causing her problems? Are you the one who is the most frustrated. Change, with age or disease is always at bay.
Prayers to both of you to navigate the next months and years.
Beachwish
Thank you
She says that she is bored, but isn’t able to make herself do anything to change that.
It hard to watch. I understand your concern.
My mother has had MCI for several years, but feels she declined over the past year while being locked down at her AL facility. Since I have now been allowed back to see her I don't really see a big change in her.
Reading and playing solitaire would indicate to me that she is still in MCI. My mother reads, does SUDUKO, puts jigsaw puzzles together and does word search puzzles. The activities of your wife are good activities to keep her mind working.
By all means when she follows up with her DOC bring up the changes you noted.
My mother always cooked, meals for us, lots of meals/dishes for parties, esp the pool parties. She loved making special meals, desserts and even, for quite a while, made elaborate wedding cakes! Some extended family members paid her to make theirs. During the later years, she pared back on these, but still cooked and made special treats. Eventually the "treats" came in a box where all ingredients are there, you just follow instructions to put it all together and bake it. By then she was into her Forman Grill and would grill up chicken and microwave veggies.
First was the repetition of questions and statements. Then it was inability to pay her bills correctly. I took over the finances at that point. After we took the car away, I had to help by delivering supplies and/or taking her grocery shopping. I tried making extra meals and freezing some for her, but I couldn't keep up! When I would show up for the next shopping trip, I'd find fresh veggies all shriveled up. I had to siphon old chicken out of the freezer and stop her from buying more! It was then I figured out she was relying on frozen dinners and boxed stuff. She wouldn't even buy enough to get through until my next trip (3hrs round trip for me!)
So, sometimes in the earliest stages, executive functions become difficult. Following instructions, even with tasks previously done, erode and while the recognition of need is there, the ability to follow through is gone. This may be where she is at now - knowing something needs to be done, but not how to attempt it. You could encourage her, but keep the steps simple and separated. One step at a time. Too many steps and she may get too confused and refuse to continue.
If you're taking her for testing, it may reveal this. Ask for recommendations to keep her engaged. Physical activity, even walking, is good. Social activity is good too, so long as it isn't too overwhelming, aka meeting up with another couple vs attending a big party. The results of testing should present some methods for keeping her active and more engaged.
As cwillie suggests, her apathy may be a sign of depression also. Mention what you notice to her doctor at her next appt. If he believes her MCI has progressed into dementia as a result of her tests, ask what the cause of the dementia is.
https://health.sunnybrook.ca/mental-health/apathy/
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2019/07/190717105335.htm