I have a good friend that's in her early 80's with eye problems. I'm looking for suggestions to get her to stop driving.

As others have said, every state has their own rules. Driving with one eye or being "legally blind" can oftentimes be okay. My former mother-in-law lost the sight in one eye and was able to continue driving. A friend of my son is considered "legally blind" but wears corrective lenses to conteract that. When just on the cusp of being considered legally blind, some correction IS possible. My older brother was incensed that our mother was still driving because "she's blind." I had to correct him on that, because "legally blind" and "blind" is NOT the same thing. At that time her eyesight in one eye was like 20/200, but the other was 20/60. I told him that one of my eyes is also 20/60 (I did have to get corrective lenses to pass the DMV eye test.) I was driving at the time, at night, when discussing this. I said let me close my better eye and see what happens - hey, look, I can see the road! I can drive okay! It is not blurry - that dx just means you cannot see at some given distance, not that you are blind.

When both eyes go beyond 20/60 and are NOT correctable with lenses, the doctor is required to report this to the DMV (or other authority who would then pass that to the DMV.) Our mother is also being treated for macular degeneration, first in that "bad" eye, now the other as well, to preserve her eyesight. I take her to the appointments, and it includes reading the eye "chart" beamed on the wall. I am constantly amazed and appalled at how they encourage her to squint, blink or whatever to read the lines she can, and then indicate that she passes!! The last visit her "good" eye could not read much. From my experience, doctors are not amenable to reporting this if it is borderline - they have their reasons, and some are understandable. They do have some rules to follow. They will NOT report it until they decide the results are conclusive. Look at it from their point of view - do THEY want to be the one depriving the person of that privilege? The most many will do is tell the person they should not be driving. A lot of good that does! I recently asked for paperwork to back up reporting blind on her taxes (last visit her eyesight drifted beyond that early limit) but got nothing. Her next appointment is next month and I will ask again for this (tax preparer did not check the box, so it won't be needed, however I want it anyway! Because the MC costs offset her tax liability, it is a moot point now.)

Getting someone who is questionable to stop driving is difficult. Even with doctor support, I have read a number of posts where the person continued to drive despite what the doctor said AND despite having the license revoked! The best thing that can be done is remove the temptation, however this is difficult enough when it is family, almost impossible if it is not. You cannot legally take your friend's keys or her car. Her family probably could, but you will need their assistance. The last renewal of mom's license required going to the DMV. Had my other brother told me about the accident she had prior to the one I was aware of (almost same damage!), I would NOT have enabled her to go there, with doctor letter in hand saying her eyesight was sufficient (needed if one cannot pass the DMV eye test.) The auto-body shop owner was the one who told me. From that point on, I tried to encourage her to sell the car and stop driving. She had already stopped driving at night, knowing she could not see well enough. Her distances driven were also reduced - eventually to just out the condo access, down that road to the grocery/pharmacy/CU. In my opinion, any TWO FEET was a concern. Last I discussed it with her, her response was "Oh, I don't go far, just down the road to the store." Mom, I don't care if you go 2 feet - if you HIT someone, they can sue you and take everything you have! Didn't matter. She, in her mind, was just fine. With the initial onset of dementia, I was concerned not only about her safety, but others. When she called once and said she needed help with a flat tire, I brought my mini-pump to fix it. What I found was a tire split open from the hub to the ground, the metal around the wheel well all bent up and likely other damage. YIKES! I asked what she hit, and she was clueless - nothing she says. It was obvious she hit something but no idea what or where. Even the rear tire/rim needed to be replaced!

I enlisted my local brother to have a chat with her (got AAA to put the spare donut on and took it to be fixed/replaced) because I saw the onset of dementia as well as the damage to the car. He did all the talking, he took the set of keys. I just stood behind him. We got the sad 5yo face, like you took her prized toy away. On the way out, I told him I know she has another set of keys, and asked if he could disable it. He pulled the battery cable. Next day, at a service for my ex, she called ME. I let it go to voice and then went outside to retrieve it. Madder than all heck, demanding her keys back, it is HER car! I called her back and said I did not touch your keys (the truth!). Well, who did then? You're so smart mom, you figure it out, and I hung up on her. The next day I got an even NASTIER call demanding that I get down there RIGHT NOW and fix whatever I did to her car! So, there was indeed another key for the car and she was going to drive it!!! I told her (again the truth) I did not touch her car (my idea, but I did not do it!) I just said I am not a mechanic, I do not know what is wrong with it, maybe the battery is just dead from sitting so long. Note here that brother had done all the talking, but she did NOT call him, she called ME!

In addition to that tire damage, both front fenders had white stripes from going in/out of the garage. Previously the back of the driver's mirror was missing as well - response to that "it was there the last time I drove it" she tells my brother. He was to use it to drive to my son's wedding, and he found the inspection expired! I tried many times to explain to mom that the privilege to drive comes with responsibility - you have to maintain the vehicle, pass yearly inspections, renew plates and insurance, AND be able to drive safely. In one ear, out the other....

Bottom line is we NEVER got ANY doctor to back us up. A family member who works dispatch told me that even the police will not, perhaps can not, stop them, at least not until there is an accident or extremely errant driving observed that warrants it. Who wants to wait for that? The police are not everywhere and may not be there to prevent anything. It could involve serious injury or death!!! We just had to act. Then we had to listen to her bitch and moan, demand her car back and whine about not having her "wheels" and then bemoan that the worst thing that she ever did was give up her "wheels". That last one was amusing, because eventually, in her mind, SHE gave it up!

In your case whaleyf, you can try any or all of the suggested methods - see if DMV will test (not written test, actually test eye and driving test) for the renewal, contact the police to inquire, see if your DMV allows reporting, enlist help from her doctor(s). Please don't be surprised when any/all of them refuse to act. I would focus on the family and see to it that they take the car, pretend it failed inspection and either keep telling her it is being worked on, or it had to be junked. If she cannot afford to buy another, the problem would be solved.