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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I need to start putting lock on food places like refrigerator and pantry for the safety of mom with dementia. I know she is going to be furious, how do I tell her?
If you need to do this than do it. You can explain but she probably won't remember why.
Yes, your feelings are normal. I too didn't like what being a caregiver made me feel I didn't like me. I had to harden myself a little so I could be the parent instead of the child. My patience was nill. I really didn't think I would be dealing with the hands on as long as I did. I was 65. My kids had been out of the house for a while. It was just me and hubby. Doing what we wanted when we wanted. I retired at 62 a year later babysitting infant Grandson. He was approaching 2 so ready for Daycare. Then Mom needed 24/7 care, In a couple of months I would have gotten my life back. Now I had another 2 yr old. Mom needed everything done for her and I was it. Brothers not nearby. Eventually, I was able to place her into an AL. Later LTC. Such a lift off my shoulders.
71? That's young to have such a level of dementia. My FIL had early onset in his mid 60s so I do know it's not unheard of.
How are you doing with being the caregiver? It surely can be challenging.
If you need to keep your mom from accessing areas of the home for her safety, just do it. Make up a theraputic lie - "I don't know why it's locked, mom". I can't open it either. Weird. Etc. It's sad when it comes to this, but here you are.
There are locks that are magnetic that you can use for the cabinets. You do not see them so she would not even know they were there you can just say the cabinet is stuck and you have called someone to fix it but it will be a while. For the fridge there are locks that are an elongated "U" shape and if you are lucky enough to have a white fridge she might not even notice it is there. Again say the door is stuck. If she is furious about the locks that will pass as it becomes part of her every day life. Leave baskets of "healthy" items out apples, oranges, bananas things like that maybe 1 or 2 granola bars, individual packs crackers. This will limit what she can take at any given time. Is there a possibility of putting a small dorm type fridge that can be hers while the other fridge is getting the door fixed? Keep water maybe a juice, a pudding cup and a yogurt in the little one she can take those to satisfy her snacking. My Husband was a snacker also and I left out fruit and 2 packages of one of his favorite cookies and he was happy when he "found" his snacks.
Of course I don't know if something like this would be practical; but just off the top of my head, as an example, one alternative might be to limit what you keep in the existing places, and set up another fridge + storage unit that she doesn't know about in the garage.
The problem is your mother won't only be furious because she's being locked out of her own storage. She will also be daily frustrated and agitated because she won't remember about the locks or what they're for. I honestly would avoid placing this obstacle in her living environment unless you absolutely have to.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Yes, your feelings are normal. I too didn't like what being a caregiver made me feel I didn't like me. I had to harden myself a little so I could be the parent instead of the child. My patience was nill. I really didn't think I would be dealing with the hands on as long as I did. I was 65. My kids had been out of the house for a while. It was just me and hubby. Doing what we wanted when we wanted. I retired at 62 a year later babysitting infant Grandson. He was approaching 2 so ready for Daycare. Then Mom needed 24/7 care, In a couple of months I would have gotten my life back. Now I had another 2 yr old. Mom needed everything done for her and I was it. Brothers not nearby. Eventually, I was able to place her into an AL. Later LTC. Such a lift off my shoulders.
How are you doing with being the caregiver? It surely can be challenging.
If you need to keep your mom from accessing areas of the home for her safety, just do it. Make up a theraputic lie - "I don't know why it's locked, mom". I can't open it either. Weird. Etc. It's sad when it comes to this, but here you are.
For the fridge there are locks that are an elongated "U" shape and if you are lucky enough to have a white fridge she might not even notice it is there. Again say the door is stuck.
If she is furious about the locks that will pass as it becomes part of her every day life.
Leave baskets of "healthy" items out apples, oranges, bananas things like that maybe 1 or 2 granola bars, individual packs crackers. This will limit what she can take at any given time.
Is there a possibility of putting a small dorm type fridge that can be hers while the other fridge is getting the door fixed? Keep water maybe a juice, a pudding cup and a yogurt in the little one she can take those to satisfy her snacking. My Husband was a snacker also and I left out fruit and 2 packages of one of his favorite cookies and he was happy when he "found" his snacks.
Of course I don't know if something like this would be practical; but just off the top of my head, as an example, one alternative might be to limit what you keep in the existing places, and set up another fridge + storage unit that she doesn't know about in the garage.
The problem is your mother won't only be furious because she's being locked out of her own storage. She will also be daily frustrated and agitated because she won't remember about the locks or what they're for. I honestly would avoid placing this obstacle in her living environment unless you absolutely have to.