My mother will be 98 years old in May and resides in the memory care unit in an assisted living facility. She suffers from dementia, hypertension, high cholesterol, polyarthritis, muscle weakness, fatty liver disease, cholelithiasis, macular degeneration and glaucoma. The arthritis is so bad that getting her in and out of the car and into a wheelchair to take her to doctor’s appointments has her screaming in pain. The only prescription medication she takes is for her cholesterol (atorvastatin) high blood pressure (lisinopril and metoprol) and glaucoma (latanoprost). The only drug her doctor ordered for her arthritis pain is Tylenol (325mg) two tablets in the morning and two before bedtime. Her insurance does not cover the visiting physician who comes into the assisted living facility, so she has to be taken out every time she goes to her PCP, which is every 3 months, first for a blood draw and then for the office call. He will not prescribe a pain medication and the Tylenol does little, if anything, for her pain.
The facility where she lives does have a van that will take her to doctor's appointments but it costs $30. She has been in this facility for 3 years at a cost of $5,300 a month and at this rate she will run out of money in two more years and I will have to try to find a Medicaid facility for her. I am in my early 70’s and the stress involved with taking her to the doctor’s when she screams in pain getting in and out of the car and the fact that her dementia gets worse every year keeps me in a constant state of anxiety.
I have sister who is six years younger than me who doesn't even call her on the phone and has not visited her even once in the three years she's been in assisted living because she lives an hour and a half away and according to her, her back hurts when she has to be in a car for more than an hour.
Would my mother qualify for hospice care even though she has no life-threatening illness? Even if she could get pain medication for the arthritis would be a blessing.
Unlike pcps,, hospice docs are expected to scrip lots of opiates and controlled drugs, such as Ativan. The whole original purpose was pain relief. Contact a hospice, preferably non profit, and avoid Vitas at all costs.
It's time to talk to her PCP about hospice or palliative care - the visits to the doctor seem like unnecessary torture for the both of you. Explain to him that this 3 month routine is akin to torture and she doesn't seem to be gaining anything by it. At this point, her comfort is what should be priority.
I'm sorry that you're going through this and hope you get some answers soon.
Does her current facility not accept Medicaid? If not you may need to consider moving her to one that does while she's still on private pay...this is so she doesn't have to be on a waiting list, if this is an issue where she lives. Current residents get first dibs on Medicaid beds before "outsiders". You may want to consult with a Medicaid Planner for her state to make sure she qualifies when needed. In most states Medicaid doesn't pay for AL or MC.
They will evaluate her and if she does not qualify for Hospice you can ask about Palliative Care. They can also help with prescriptions as well as managing pain.
If at this time she does not qualify for Hospice (and I seriously doubt that would happen) once on Palliative Care the Team that sees her would be the first to notice when she would be able to transition to Hospice.
Make the call to the Hospice of your choice. Many facilities have great relationships with all the Hospice that are in your area and could give you some suggestions if you do not know what is available.
I had to think long and hard about placing her on hospice as, once she is on hospice, no diagnosing or testing is allowed to be done. Mom has recently taken on a very yellow skin tone which indicates to me that something may be wrong with her liver. The hospice nurse said that, even if that was true, all they could do would be to remove her from what few meds she is currently taking. Hospice would not administer a UTI test for a possible infection but just prescribed a broad-spectrum antibiotic for her. The goal for Mom now is comfort.
Her dementia has progressed so quickly and I think part of that is a result of the move from the MC facility to a Residential Group Home with 6 residents and two caregivers. She has stopped walking and talking and just about stopped eating and drinking. It is very sad and leaves me with such a helpless feeling.
The Hospice Nurse comes about once a week and I can text her if I need to, but she is very realistic about her goal for Mom's care. The aide still showers Mom three times a week and gets her dressed for the day (still don't know why they insist on getting her up if she is non-responsive.) Hospice provided a tall-back wheel-chair for her and they supply briefs and bed pads and wipes and meds that qualify as "not curative". The hospice doctor only comes to see her at 6 months and that is to determine if Mom still qualifies for hospice care.
Mom was having trouble breathing last Sunday and we called the on-call hospice nurse who came to check on her and put her on oxygen. The nurse asked me if I wanted to take her off of hospice and send her to the hospital in case she stopped breathing all together so the hospital could maybe revive her. Nope. I don't want my mother anywhere near a hospital. Besides, there is a DNR in place. So, you can go off hospice, get treatment, then go back on if you still qualify.
This is one of the most frustrating and exasperating aspects of the US healthcare system. Your mother has access to two licensed physicians. One her insurance won't pay for. The one her insurance WILL pay for won't prescribe her adequate pain relief. I don't know how you restrain yourselves, sometimes, I honestly don't - the longing to bang people's heads together would overwhelm me on these occasions.
Actually, thinking it through, I'm now even crosser. You're paying for insurance which doesn't cover the healthcare service she can access. You're paying for a facility's services, and their services aren't made available to her. And her doctor is paid by her insurer, and denies her treatment for her pain. Wouldn't it be nice to get all of these USELESS people in one room and ask them what they've got to say for themselves?
Immediately change her insurance to cover these services.
My mom has a visiting physician and I have also located a home visit lab & mobile xray service. Her insurance covers the labs but mobile xray is not covered. It still is well worth the pain, time, stress of needing to move her to an office. Mom is also using community palliative care services. No charge. Her facility should provide visiting services for dental, eye and podiatry.
Please check into these things for your poor mom. She will get monthly check ins and it will be a lifesaver for you.
God bless.
She has dementia, compression fractures from osteoporosis,
A fib, hypertension. She seems to be sleeping more during the day and I think the dementia is progressing lately. She hasn't been able to walk since before she got there 3 and a half years ago. She hasn't been able to stand for the past 2 years.
This happened during lock down with Covid. I was told they were changing her in
bed. All the moving can aggravate the fractures.
Also, eating less.
I asked the nurse if she thinks she would quality for hospice. My mom turned 103
in Feb. She said she should quality because she is over 100. Not true!
The hospice nurse and director evaluated her and went through her chart,
weighed her. I was told she doesn't qualify.
She would have to loose weight, fall multiple times, be taken to the ER etc.
She hasn't, thank God, been to the ER since last year when her fractures caused
severe pain that took her breath away. That is when we found out about the A fib.
The treatment for that is blood thinner which she is not prescribed because of her age. She has Tylenol for pain but she has to ask for it. She has dementia, people!
Hospice will evaluate her again in 2 weeks.
Some of the residents have been on hospice for years.
My husband is in hospice and getting him there was a exhausting. Two agencies turned him down because he did not meet THEIR eligibility criteria, regardless of what the doc said. The third agency accepted him. The services are fantastic.
Shop around. Good luck.
So the doctor writes the order for hospice to come out & evaluate mom (I didn't read the responses here, so I'm sure it's been said already). Hospice has to find a viable condition that MEDICARE will pay for; my mother had congestive heart failure but it wasn't killing her, so hospice used "Senile Degeneration of the Brain" as the terminal disease that would meet Medicare requirements. The first time in November she was turned down for hospice; the second time I asked for an eval. was in Dec and I spoke directly to the nurse at length; told her of ALL mom's conditions and how she showtimed up a storm, in spite of advanced dementia, but that she had chronic pain and had been declining something awful the past 6 months. She was ACCEPTED on that 2nd evaluation, thank God, b/c she passed away 2 months & 1 day later. Hospice was great; they were able to give her pain meds and anti anxiety meds that kept her calm and pain free throughout her end of life experience. Plus they brought in a hospital bed, special wheelchair, Depends, chucks, everything was free to us. Your mother would benefit greatly from the nurse/cna/chaplain and social worker visits from hospice, not to mention the medications they can give her for pain management. Tylenol is a joke, really; I know, I have bad arthritis which is awful.
I really hope you can get these services in for your mom. Also ask the Memory Care ALF which hospice company they use most; that helps YOU b/c they work closely WITH the hospice company to facilitate the best care for your mom.
Best of luck!
Hospice doesn't have the "time frame till death" requirement any more.
It appears your mother has informed you of her wishes. It's crazy to have to force her to suffer so much to see a doc. Hospice would be a kindness. She'd get the pain relief she desperately needs, and you will benefit too. There is no cost and no time limit.
Best of luck to you.