I'm in Florida and my grand mother has dementia. My mother and my aunt have power of attorney but my aunt has been doing things without my mothers consent. And now it has gotten to the point where my aunt has changed the bank account information and won't let my mom know, and she tells my mother that she is now being paid to take care of my grandmother and won't allow my mom to know any of the details. Can something be done about this?
If the POA appointment clause reads that either can act w/o concurrence of the other, then your aunt does have authority to act independently.
Does the POA or DPOA establish that your GM has to be incapable of making financial, legal, and similar decisions, or does it grant authority to the proxies whatever your GM's mental state is?
As to "chang(ing) bank account information), how was it changed? Is your aunt signatory only with your GM now? Your GM would have to sign any signature card which changes authority, and if your GM's dementia is at a stage at which she shouldn't be making financial decisions, then your aunt's actions are improper, and could be considered fraudulent.
I think you and your mother might want to visit the bank to find out exactly what was changed. BTW, how did you learn about this change?
Is your aunt claiming to be paid for caregiving, and is that allegedly arising from her authority as co-proxy under a POA or DPOA? Is there a caregiver contract?
My first stop would be to the bank, to clarify what was changed, and if necessary and if your aunt has overstepped her authority, my next action would be to contact either an Estate Planning or Elder Law attorney to discuss how to proceed, and whether fraud charges should be discussed with local law enforcement.
The only extra point I'd make is that, even if they are required to act "jointly and severally", so that your aunt is able to act without your mother's agreement, your mother would still be responsible for safeguarding your grandmother's best interests and therefore still has to make herself aware of exactly what is going on. So: 1. your mother doesn't have the option of doing nothing and giving way; and 2. your aunt, while she doesn't necessarily need your mother's agreement, must still provide your mother will full information. It cuts both ways: your mother also has to tell your aunt what she's up to, too.
Anyway - no point speculating. See if you can find out exactly what it says on the POA documentation.
And you're also absolutely correct, by the way - it's your poor grandmother who's squeezed in the middle between them :( But never fear, there will be a way through.
The thing is, your poor auntie. You see, most of us here have been in her shoes and will naturally tend to sympathise with her - the stress she'll be under will be doing terrible things to her sense of proportion, her openness to discussion, her toleration of any remarks or suggestions that could be perceived (never mind if rightly or wrongly) as criticism; her willingness to take the time to explain your grandmother's routines and how visits might unsettle her (your grandmother) - you name it. Talking to her may become rather like trying to cuddle a porcupine.
But communication is the only answer. Is she still speaking constructively to anyone in the family? Because this can't continue as is, of course; and please don't think I'm not sympathetic to your mother too; but it will need skilled mediation to resolve it.