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My 87 year old father lives with my sister and her husband and does not sleep at night. He comes out of his bedroom multiple times, dressed in a different outfit each time as though it was the next day. She puts him back in his pajamas and then 30 minutes later, the same thing- he comes out dressed for the new day. This happens all throughout the night even though he takes Risperidone and Melatonin at bedtime. Is there any medication that will knock him out so everyone can sleep? If anyone has had any success with a medication, or different bedtime routine, please advise! Thank you!

The caregiver who takes him to his doctor’s appointments needs to be honest and open with the doctor about what is occurring. It is painful to discuss a patient’s issues in front of them; however, it is necessary to convey the problems to the doctor in order for him/her to adjust treatment.

When I first took over the care of my father, he had been allowed to sleep whenever he wanted and few of his behavioral problems had been disclosed to his doctor (my mother was his caregiver and was extremely ill so I certainly don’t blame her). I also have a few people who help me out so I can have breaks and I found they were allowing him to sleep all day not knowing he would then be awake all night. It took some time to slowly ease him into a regular sleep schedule and to adjust his medication but we have finally reached a point that he goes to bed at a reasonable hour, sleeps throughout the night most nights, and arises at 730-800am.

At this point he is on 50 mg of seroquel, .25 mg of Xanax, and a melatonin tablet right before bedtime. I’m not saying that will work for you, but that’s what works for him now. His physician has had to adjust the medication several times over the course of the last four years and I’m sure he will have to adjust it again.

I did a couple of other things that help him stay on top of him getting out of bed. I installed security cameras throughout most of the house but particularly his bedroom. I can check in on him throughout the night without disturbing him and, when needed, I can set the camera to alert me if he moves. Second I place a pressure sensitive mat next to his bed so that I get an alert whenever he gets out of bed. At this point, the only times he gets out of bed at night is when he wakes from a dream and is confused. I can usually talk with him until he wakes up a little more and the confusion subsides.

I know some people will say that the cameras and mat are an invasion of his privacy, but he is has late stage Alzheimer’s and I see them as protection for him.

Anyway, I hope you find some solutions soon as I know how difficult it can be caring for someone who wanders at night.
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BioMom41 Jun 28, 2024
Thank you for sharing, this really validates my personal situation with my Mother. Goodness life is so fragile, Mother wishes to age in place and I the only living relative to maintain contact with this bipolar/ schizophrenia woman is desperately trying to manage her care. I fortunately have a sweet little gentleman whom she knew years prior and allows him to manage her meds, bring her groceries and in general be the on site handyman. All of this works very well for me.
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I've never personally had to deal with Sundowning, but I do know that there are several medications available to help with it. Have your sister talk to your fathers doctor about that.
But in all reality it does sound like your father now needs to be placed in a memory care facility, as they are better equipped to deal with all phases of dementia, including Sundowning.
Your sister not getting proper sleep is going to be detrimental to her health, and you certainly don't want her being in the statistic of 40% of caregivers dying before their loved one with dementia from stress related issues now do you?
It's time now to do what is best for all involved.
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Your sister needs to talk to your dad's doctor and explain what is going on.
There are medications that can help. It may be that the medication he is on needs to be adjusted.
Also what does your dad do all day? Is he active or more sedentary? If he is more active he might be m ore tired and may fall asleep and stay asleep.
If there is an Adult Day Program near by that might help. Typically the participant is picked up in the morning and brought to the Day program they get a breakfast, Lunch, snack and activities and then brought back home.
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My cousin who was caregiving my very elderly Aunt with advanced dementia was giving her Tylenol PM. I think this works for a while and then the person develops a tolerance for it (but I'm not certain). It can also cause constipation.

It worked but then eventually stopped. Then we began a routince of tiring her out during the day: we had her folding a large stack of kitchen towels multiple times a day, sorting colored poker chips, sorting plastic utensils, etc. Her caregiver walked her around her house, walked her to the mailbox and set her up in a portable foot pedaler machine while she watched tv (for 20-30 minutes). This helped her burn both physical and mental energy. She only napped once a day for about 1 to 1-1/2 hours after lunch. Went to bed at 10pm, woke up at 9am. She didn't need the OTC Tylenol anymore for a long time. Then, even exercising her stopped working.

I realize not everyone is able to do this all day long with their LO (this was a paid family caregiver). Then 1 time my Aunt got past her bed barriers and out of her bed at night and fell and broke her hip. Went downhill from there.

Your Father needs more exercise and less napping (if he's doing that) but also meds at night so everyone can get rest. Or, maybe a MC facility is an option since his care needs will become more and not less. An elder with advancing dementia who is also mobile poses a special challenge since they are a much higher fall risk. You may want to consider putting his mattress on the floor to make it more difficult to get out of bed at night, or buy an adjustable bed that lowers significantly or a concave mattress.
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Please check with his Dr first. I have been giving alcohol free ZQuill. I found it on Amazon. Hospice Dr said it’s ok for my spouse. Also, sometimes I give Melatonin chews - it also comes in liquid form, just to mix it up. He can also have Clonazapam (sp) which helps quiet the mind. There’s also magnesium supplements that help with sleep.

Ive noticed my spouse goes back and forth a lot. Sometimes he goes right to sleep; other times he’s busy with his hands (fidgety) or chatty (word salad). I have a bed pad alarm that wakes me if he’s too fidgety during the night and he’s not too bad. He may be awake, but at least he’s not trying to get out of bed. He is bedridden, but still attempts to get up once in a while…that’s getting better.

Be patient with him, try and distract him or give extra love during sundowning. Easier said then done, I know.

Please check with Dr before giving him anything for sleep,
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DeannaS: Speak with your father's primary care physician about medication to prevent insomnia. Also, you may want to get your father outside on a sunny day for some vitamin D from the sun to reset his circadian rhythm pattern.
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CaringWifeAZ Jun 29, 2024
I like your suggestion to get him outside in the sun!
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I wanted to expand on the consistent routine.
It is possible your father has created his own routine of waking and getting dressed several times a night. If you can find a way to break that cycle and create a new routine in its place, he will want to repeat whatever becomes his comfortable routine. Right now, he's compulsively repeating an activity which is probably no more comfortable for him than it is for your sister and brother-in-law.
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My husband is sensitive to drugs. Trazadone severely agitated him where he was kicking and punching. Took 3 days to get it out of his system. I keep him awake as much as I can with cat naps. Around 7p I give him one 5mg melatonin gummy then at 830 -845pm I give him one Tylenol pm . Make sure he voids then to bed. That's his best routine. I had also tried seraquel and Ativan with bad results.
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My mother experiences sundowning. I am in California where there are cannabis dispensaries. I give her a 5mg THC gummy. Works better than anything. It slows her racing mind. She’s calmer and even seems giggly and happy. It helps her appetite too.

Her previous neurologist prescribed Seroquel saying, “we give it to everyone, it works well.” What a joke. Within a half hour she became psychotic and homicidal. Her PCP and new neurologist both know she’s taking the gummy’s and are glad it’s working.
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