My sister is seeking assistance from an organization that claims to help keep seniors in their homes. She is caregiver for our father, and he has some health concerns but not dementia. She needs help getting him to appointments, but they are asking her all sorts of questions, giving her something to sign, she's getting very nervous they will force him into a nursing home. I can't be up there with her to help out, we are both very stressed.
Once a person accepts help from anything to do with the state, they are in charge and will be the one making the decisions.
I've worked for many seniors and their families privately and saw first-hand what happens. They could be living a pretty decent life with their family, then the family starts getting offers from all kinds of organizations claiming all kinds of free resources available to help out with their elderly "loved one". Except all this help and programs are never free. They get their money when a house has to be sold because they put the senior into a nursing home for some minor reason.
If your sister starts accepting these services and signs anything she and your father will have social workers and the state up both their a$$es all the time. And yes they can put your father in a nursing home for any reason they say. Then his house and everything he has gets handed over.
Tell your sister to sign nothing.
Best wishes to you and your family.
If your father does not assign your sister (or you or someone he trusts) as his durable PoA, then eventually the county (through social services) may need to step in as guardian once he is no longer competent to run his affairs, since the law does not allow just anyone to manage another's sensitive and critical affairs like financial and medical. Banks and investment entities certainly do not. Just because your sister is a close relative or lives with him does not grant her this authority. PoA paperwork needs to be created by your father while he has all his mental faculties (preferably by an elder law attorney). A 2-hr consult would be an excellent investment before he signs anything further.
Your sister apparently does not understand how taxing and expensive caring for another person in their home can become (even if it isn't currently). We all decline as we age (sometimes faster and more sudden than anticipated) and there's no getting away from this fact. In many instances people get better care in facilities, especially if they have more advanced or complex medical problems. Keeping a LO in their home can imprison them, especially if it is difficult to transfer them from bed to wheelchair, from wheelchair to car, etc. If she already needs help getting him to appointments she will find out there is no one organization or charity that will do this for free unless he qualifies for some program (and depending on where he lives, there may not be many or any).
Your dad and sister are presumably competent adults. He needs to read the paperwork and ask a lot of questions — that's his absolute responsibility. In a court of law, "ignorance" is not accepted as a defense. If he loses his house and savings because he willingly signed paperwork that he didn't understand, he may not have anyplace to live. He may be causing himself to disqualify for Medicaid, which would be his only last hope of financial help. Please read this to your sister and father. They need to stop signing papers that they don't understand. If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Still solid wisdom.