Our sister was in a nursing facility in Cincinnati, Ohio. They cremated her 30 days ago, without contacting our family.
She was assigned a guardian. However, family was periodically in contact with guardian and in constant contact with facility and visiting.
Is it legal in the state of Ohio to not notify the family of the death of a relative? Whose responsibility would it be to contact the family, in event of death, the guardian or facility administrator?
This was devastating to our family and very inhuman. Please give us some direction.
I am so sorry that you have experienced this tragedy. I am so sorry for the loss of your sister. Finding out about her in this manner must have been a horrible shock.
Plus, why on earth would they cremate your sister without your permission to do so?
I don’t know if this is legal. I certainly don’t feel like it is appropriate when a resident has family members who check in with the staff at their facility on a regular basis.
Can you check with the administrator of the facility to see if this is their policy?
Please notify the ombudsman in your area of this situation and see what feedback you receive from them.
Yes, the family should have been notified.
You do not mention why your sister was in Skilled Nursing. If your sister was cognizant at some point after the Guardian was appointed she may have said she wanted to be cremated. If that is the case the Guardian was just following her wishes.
I am sorry you were not notified.
You might want to write a letter to the Judge that was assigned and also to the Guardian and ask why family was not notified and ask what the "normal" practice is.
If your sister was in a facility out of state, it made a difficult situation even more distressing. May you receive comfort knowing that she is now at peace.
Your questions should go to the crematorium management. They did the cremation and would be the most familiar with the laws in Ohio. My experience has been that crematoriums are careful to stay within state laws - they don't want this particular situation occurring. When my inlaws were cremated, even though they had made all the arrangements themselves before their deaths - all of my husband's full siblings had to sign off before cremation could occur.
AL probably left it to the guardian to notify you. AL's concern would be to have the body removed ASAP.
What may have also happened, if where the sister lived her city has it, the city could cremate her free of charge and her remains would be held by the funeral home that did the cremation.
Our protocol at the AL I worked at was when someone passed away or went to the hospital, the administrator called whoever was legally in charge of them.
If your sister had family who regularly visited her and a sister (you) who's asking advice here, why were none of you her legal guardian? There's living family who visits regularly as you say and your sister still had a state-appointed guardian? Shameful.
The nursing home did not have her cremated. The body got removed from the nursing home then her guardian told the coroner's office how to proceed. This guardian should have called the family if they had some contact information because that would have been the right thing to do morally. They weren't legally obligated to inform any of you. Neither was the nursing home. The nursing home followed their protocol and will have documentation proving they did. No one wants a lawsuit.
Talk to her guardian and see if you can find out about where her ashes are. I can't see how they would have an issue with letting the family have a memorial service and dispose of them as they choose.
The guardian likely SHOULD have contacted family (morally or from a moral standpoint) but I do not know that the guardian HAD TO contact the family legally. The facility was under no obligation to contact anyone other than the guardian.
It was the guardian who arranged cremation, not the facility; they do not make those decisions.
The family may be devastated, but the fact is that no one in the family qualified to be guardian, or chose to (and we can't know the circumstances involved in all of this).
If this was a sudden death, one without any warning or not predicted, then I can see how some things slipped through the cracks. I would think, if the family was regularly visiting they may have been aware of this impending death? I would think the facility would have had the name of one single family member requesting notifications? But apparently none of this was done.
I am sorry for this grief and this loss, but in the case of a legally appointed guardian they are in charge as though they were the duly appointed son. Theirs is the management and oversite of what is to be done. I am very sorry you feel so let down and that there was such a breach in communication, but of course now this is DONE, and there is nothing to be done about it but mourn your sad loss and move on with your lives. Grief counselors tell us that in grief we often try to "be mad" at someone. Whether that's a doctor, a hospital, a caregiver, a lawyer or whatever, our anger feels so much better to us than grief and loss, which is such a final thing.
I am so sorry you are all going through this.
My condolences on your loss.