My wife has had dementia for a little over five years. I am her caregiver. She cannot control her urine and now her bowels are becoming unpredictable. I help her with all her needs. She feeds herself. I clothe and bathe her and do all the necessary things to maintain a household. She talks very little and spends most of the day listening to oldies stations on the TV. She reads a little. Her mental outlook is very positive.
What signs should I be looking for?
I believe that most of us wait much to long to get Hospice involved. They can offer comfort, 24/7 phone advice and can help avoid unnecessary ER visits and hospitalizations.
Before death, she'll talk less.
She'll start sleeping more than being awake.
She'll start eating and drinking less.
One of the last things, she will have what is called the death rattle which is a weird sound with her breathing.
Prayers
You're with your wife--you are going to have to be her advocate.
Hospice was a Godsend to us when daddy began the slow decline into the end of his life. It made his passing calm and peaceful, and kept him comfortable. That's what it's there for.
With Hospice you will get more help as well as supplies, information.
Hospice does not necessarily mean..."6 months" (My Husband was on Hospice for almost 3 years...Alzheimer's and maybe Vascular dementia)
You will have a Nurse that will come at least 1 time a week to check on her and order medications.
You will have a CNA that will come at least 2 times a week, more if needed to bathe, dress, change bedding if needed. The CNA will also order supplies for you, give you information and if equipment is needed to make your job easier and safer the CNA will show you how to use any equipment. While you can do all this yourself, and have been having someone else will give you a break for a few hours.
I would not have been able to care for my Husband the way I did if it had not been for the help and support I got from Hospice.