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Thank you all for your support and helpful answers. Mom passed away earlier this week. It was the worst week imaginable and honestly it is a relief that she no longer hurts.

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Derochka, I am so sorry for your loss! ((((((Hugs))))))
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I, too, am so sorry for your loss. My mom passed three years ago, it was a relief. know that many stay here and still learn from each other. You are always welcome should you want to return.
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I'm so sorry for your loss.
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D, I am so sorry for your loss and I so appreciate your coming here to say that the relief of pain is a release for you in a real sense. For my bro, who I lost in early May, I feel the same. I miss him. But I don't miss suffering and his own suffering and fear of what was to come for him. I write him the same long letters I did in life when we were separated, and decorate it, celebrate what we had; am so thankful to have had him as my main protector for all my 78 years. It was a great relief to me, even in my grieving, never to have to fear for him again.
I wish you would stay. You will have learned so much to share here to help others. If you go, I hope you will return.
My deepest sympathy to you. I am so thankful your Mom is at peace, and that you can now celebrate her life and her love without fear and pain.
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Derochka, my thoughts, best wishes, and support go with you as you face this next stage of your life, and remember, it's only normal and helpful to let yourself drift back to the good times with your mother.   Don't push yourself, and remember that, as you wrote, she's no longer in pain.

My sincere condolences go out to you.
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I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom 2 yrs ago & my dad 7 months ago. I miss them dearly, but know that the suffering they experienced is over. I cherish the good memories & hope that you can do the same. Keep the forum in mind as maybe the experience that you recently had can be shared helping others as they seek help. After dealing with your mom's household & belongings you'll be able to start a new chapter in your life. Good luck in your future endeavors! 🧡🙏
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So sorry for your loss........
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Dear "derochka,"

My sincere condolences to you in the loss of your mom this past week. I'm glad that in spite of it being the "worst week imaginable," that you are able to see it as a relief knowing she is no longer suffering. It doesn't take away from your own pain and grief but, that perspective can only help you in this next stage in your journey going forward.

I can understand you wanting to leave the forum at this point. You do need time to yourself right now as there will be enough things to do while you're going through the grieving process. The first time I lost a parent in 2004 which was a shock in and of itself, I really had a hard time accepting the fact that while I felt I was "standing still" - life's responsibilities were still there waiting for me to tend to them. You have your "year of firsts" to go through now.

You never know somewhere down the line, you may want to return to the forum and help others whether it be in the caregiving realm and/or with handling grief. Either way it will be here if you should desire to do so.

You will be in my thoughts and prayers - may God surround you with His love and give you rest, peace and comfort during this difficult time in your life.
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I am so sorry for your loss.  I do get the "relief" part...  I hope this forum has been helpful to you on some level.  If anything, just to know that there are so many of us out here dealing with the same thing.  You were never alone.

Take care.
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