Why does my father in law treat me like I'm invisible? He not only treats me this way but also his grand children living in the same house. Unfortunately he lives with us, us being his son and his 2 grand kids. He never speaks to me or the grand kids. He treats us like we're invisible & sometimes his actions say that very loudly. Other than the fact that he doesn't like me why does he treat me like I'm his Invisible DIL? Why does he ignore his grand children? My side of the family exists & we don't treat people like garbage. I do sense some jealousy. I'm just trying to understand why he never speaks to me even when I'm nice to him. I have already started the silence treatment with him & have complained enough to my husband. My husband just wants him out of our lives for good, he does not want to deal with the situation & just ignores everything.
You said he's not mean - he could be depressed. Does he need any encouragement to meet people, like at a senior center? His first wife passed and his 2nd wife left him...maybe he's still carrying a lot of those losses and getting out to meet others his age could benefit him.
I think the best way to change behavior or improve a situation is to address it. Wishing you all the very best - and hoping things get better!
Good luck making hubby see he must take action now, his wife and kids deserve respect.
The fact that no one talk to him could also be a reason for his actions. Sometimes we need to put ourselves into that person's shoes to understand why he seems so bitter.
If not what he is doing in inexcusable and YOUR husband NEEDS to set his dad strait.
A simple..."Dad if you do not begin to show my family respect and consideration you are goin to have to move to an Assisted Living. We can begin looking next week."
If your husband is on the bandwagon to get him out of the house that makes it a bit easier to follow through with the above talk.
Now you do not mention ANY medical conditions or why he is living with you.
If FIL is not cognizant then the discussion is meaningless and just a tour of Memory Care facilities needs to be scheduled and then move him in.
Why does your husband put up with this?
This must put a horrible stress on you , your relationship with your husband, and your childrens mental health.
Your fil needs to leave, for everyones mental health and well-being.
I'm sorry you are going through this. If you can fill any of us in , that would be great.
There is no point in doing all the jobs while FIL gets away with being offensive. Stop putting up with it, and stop doing all the jobs. If FIL still talks to your DH, he may complain to him. Your husband needs to stop ignoring him, tell him that ‘he wants him out of our lives’ if that's the case, and give him an ultimatum to get out if his behavior doesn’t improve. Your DH just ‘a wishin and a hopin’ (and 'ignoring') isn’t getting the message across.