Mom asks to go food shopping with me once a week. I go alone 5-6 times a week. I buy produce, rice, and whole grain cereals. When Mom goes she buys cupcakes, caramels, candy, cookies, and frappuccinos, usually several of each. I am NOT looking for a "let them eat whatever they want" versus "why do you even have junk food in the house?" debate. I just try to strike a balance on that.
What concerns me is the waste. I try to make sure we have some of everything because it's inevitable that she will want whatever I didn't buy. She's obsessed with the worry that she'll run out of cupcakes or candy, so she gets more before she's eaten what we have.
Before I arrived, they bought a new fridge and kept the old one so they'd have room for everything, even though there were only two people and Dad barely eats. She buys more food than either of them can eat and he tends to buy things he used to like but now forgets to eat. Neither of them replaces lids, tops, or covers the food with foil or saran. Food goes bad either because it dries out or there's just too much of it.
Mom likes to buy a whole roasted chicken, but then only wants a chicken sandwich once. Two weeks will go by before she wants another and by that time I've fed the chicken to our dogs and cats so it isn't wasted.
Night before last, she bought 3 boxes of instant pudding even though we already have 3 boxes at home that we've had for 4 months.
Do I just resign myself both to the madness AND the waste?
P.S. If dementia is involved I believe in adapting to my loved one because adapting and learning is over for them.
When we had to move mom out of her house we took a huge amount to be donated to a local women's shelter, but that was mostly canned and packaged or frozen food. With these kinds of sweet foods your mom wants it's now or never.
You can either continue to let mom go shopping once a week, or you can curtail it. (And why are you shopping 5 or 6 times a week?) Maybe she just wants to be out and about? What about mall walking? No buying!
Is there an activity that you can get your mom involved in, to redirect her? What about baking a cake or cupcakes or cookies once a week? It can be from scratch or a mix, it doesn't matter, but maybe that is something she might enjoy?
Otherwise, is she still able to walk or do any sort of exercise?
You might also try something I do for myself, set her her own spending limit for "treats" and give her a calculator. She will have to make a decision instead of being impulsive.
Otherwise just know that your pets are probably really happy about the situation :D good luck!!
Sounds like you need to start making some decisions for her or refuse to take her with you.
I am finding my Mother is returning somewhat to her childish ways so I treat her like a child when she acts like one. Not my favorite thing to do !
Hope the best for you.
She used to walk to shopping where she used to live and when I cleaned out her house when she sold it, there was so much food waste - with duplicates and triplicates on everything. 2 freezers filled with so much meat and she never made any of it!