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My father passed away nearly 5 years ago and my oldest brother is his namesake. He lives in a different state and when mom speaks with him on the phone she thinks she’s talking to her husband. She wants to visit him or move to be with him. After the call she’s very confused and tired. Everything I read tells me to go along with her current story, but I have to say, this lie makes me really uncomfortable. Has anyone else dealt with this situation?

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Let it go, no reason to answer, just say Ok and move on. Eventually she will forget about this too. If she presses you I would say when you rec a letter from her doctor that she can travel it will be considered. The doctor will never write the letter.
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It seems doubtful that she can understand that it is not her husband. Even if you tell her 100 times, might not help.

I would just let it go and chalk it up to dementia and just use a vague response to deal with it.

There seem to be lots of odd and awkward things family and caregivers are forced to deal with.
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I don't understand not just saying that she was talking to her son, daddy's name sake.

I would encourage your brother to make a point of saying who he is, Hi mom it's your son, how are you? I would say it multiple times during the conversation and when he is hanging up maybe say something about loving her and dad and missing them both.

It obviously hurts her to believe that she can't be with her husband, so I would do everything possible to help her hear and maybe understand it's her son.
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Think of it not as a lie, but as a "therapeutic fib".

"I know you miss him mom; he can't come right now".

"The doctor says that you are not well enough to travel right now; let's talk to him at your next appointment".

Would those work?
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