My father has always been very controlling and eccentric. However, this has gotten worse as he ages (now in his fifties) and due to the pandemic.
He is a conspiracy theorist and always likes to go 'against the flow' of what most people think e.g he believes 9/11 was done by the US government, does not think the moon landing was real...
When covid first started, he completely freaked out. He bought a huge freezer for the house and stockpiled food, we were not allowed to go anywhere without masks, hand sanitizer always, ordered groceries to the house instead of leaving... He believed it was some type of insane virus created by some government.
Now, a year and a half later, he believes the covid isn't real. A complete 360. I have no idea what is going through his mind. He recieves all of his information through 'alternative sources' such as social media posts or news articles from very niche websites. He thinks the vaccine is some experimental gene therapy and will result in the deaths of millions within a few years. He does not wear masks when going out and speaks to anybody he meets about the dangers of the vaccine. He is repeatedly emailing my school about no vaccine mandate and how they are killing people. I know many people who have gotten covid and were seriously affected. He refuses to listen to me and insists they have underlying diseases and covid is harmless.
My entire family is forbidden from getting vaccinated.
I may have to get it for university soon and he is completely in denial about it. Every time I bring it up he insists I am not going to university. My boyfriend is vaccinated and he dislikes my boyfriend because he believes the vaccine will somehow 'shed' into my blood (???) He also talks to my boyfriend about taking him to get blood tests to prove to me the vaccine is killing him.
He does not listen to any type of evidence and if I disagree with him, it becomes a huge 'argument' (him yelling about how disrespectful I am, how I should listen to him, how I must think he's so stupid...) Any disagreement with him is instantly met with self pity from him or talking about how intelligent he is and how I should listen to him. Every day he sends me multiple anti vax news and asks me about it to ensure I have read/watched it. If I can't answer it becomes another fight. I do not mind if we have differences in opinion. I am just sad about this because we are fighting everyday, he thinks I do not respect him and he will actually prevent me from going to university over this. I cannot afford it on my own.
He is completely insane about this. I am very tired.
My sister has a stress condition caused by dealing with him. Her psychologist recommended she have a meeting with my dad to see what the issue is. It ended in him screaming at the psychologist and angrily storming out. He thinks his behaviour is completely normal and I am stupid for disagreeing.
I am sorry this question is all over the place. I am very tired and at a loss of what to do. He always believes he is correct and cannot possibly be wrong. I don't like talking about this with people in real life. I always feel I am 'betraying' him if I complain or mention anything about him. Please help.
Did your mother leave because your father was abusive? Where I live, it would be very unusual for parents not to have joint custody or at least visitation with both parents.
Do you attend school? Are you not able to talk to teachers or counselors there?
If you're 18, get vaccinated immediately, and yes, you'll have to be vaccinated to go to college as well. If you can contact your doctor's office, ask for a copy of your vaccination records, because you'll need them to go to college. (You'll also need the meningitis vaccine, too.)
I'm surprised your sister's therapist hasn't reported your dad to social services, as he's created an unsafe home for his minor children. You should go to your school counselor and tell them you're in an unsafe living situation. They are required by law to report it. If they don't (and sadly, some won't), contact the police yourself. Go to the police station in person if you need to.
Where's Mom in all of this?
I would not say my father is creating an unsafe environment. He is a great dad and very encouraging and supportive the majority of the time. He would never be violent. We get along well most of the time. I think that is why I am really struggling to do anything drastic. I also have a younger sibling who I would like to help protect. Right now his anger is mostly focused on me.
He falls into these times of obsession over something and he will be very manic about this issue and be hyper focused on it. Right now, it is this covid. My sibling and I have all our other vaccinations. It is only with this one that he has gone down the conspiracy route and is completely lost in it.
I think he has a lot of anger issues and mood swings that he cannot control, like the yelling and screaming when we fight. I don't think he realizes he is doing it or that he is being unreasonable, but any attempt to talk is met with more hostility and anger. Mostly he is just guilt tripping and thinks he is always correct. He is very mocking and dismissive if I disagree with him, he will call me selfish, stupid, say I have no experience because I am only a kid... scream at my face and rant for 50-60 minutes at a time where I have to stand and listen or else it's worse. It's scary to approach him because I never know what mood he will be in, like a happy, talkative one or a explosive rant one.
I know he cries sometimes after these 'fights.' But normally he is starting it and doing the screaming, while I am crying or silent, so I don't understand why.
My parents are divorced. I do not have a relationship with my mother.
Thank you so much for your comment :)
Thank you so much for your help!! :)