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Sidebar on the QIT: this is a way to qualify folks whose INCOME (as opposed to assets) are over the Medicaid limit. The excess goes into the trust which reverts to the State upon death. Not sure HOW that's going to help tour mom at all at this point, since mom is not eligible for Medicaid by reason of gifting 200k to your brother.

He should be at the lawyer's office, trying to find a way to get the NH to accept mom at a reduced rate until this can be hammered out, not trying to save on legal fees.
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Onlysis astonished at your reaction to this! You seem to be taking it n stride. Maybe bro has done things like this all his life. I would be much less forgiving and absolutely livid. Bro would have been in jail, in no time, if he were mine and this my situation.
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I'm so sorry you're going through this issue due to your brother's dishonesty. First, yes, the nursing home CAN discharge your mother due to lack of payment. Second, they must discharge to a "safe and healthy" environment. Third, believe it or not, nursing homes are known to deliver mom to the emergency room of nearest hospital and "dump" her or take her to the nearest Salvation Army or just plain bring her home (to the address of nearest relative). I was an Ombudsman Supervisor, I've seen it happen. Nursing homes are businesses and their bottom line is about profit, not loss, even if it's human life.
Brother needs to be reported to police and Adult Protective Services (APS) for financial exploitation. Unfortunately, when relatives exploit most elders don't want to "get them in trouble."
Most people don't like APS, but it's necessary to work with them rather than against them to get the help you need in this matter.
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I agree with BarbBrooklyn on the POA brother having serious mental illness.
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Sounds like NH, Medicaid and Medicare working something out - basically mom becomes a ward of the state might be for the good. But frankly I would not even consider taking on POA responsibilities - you don't know what other alligators are lurking in the swamp and it sounds like there might be some nasty ones. As for bro, I am wondering if this kind of behavior has been going on a long time, with family rescues. Better to confront behavior and let consequences happen - maybe this might have been forestalled.
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Thanks again everyone. I don't agree that I am taking this in stride. Just making great efforts to keep my emotions reigned in until I can find some solid answers. I am my only support; I need my job, and I'm required to show up daily without the baggage of my personal issues. (The day after receiving this news involved a few sudden crying jags in the bathroom at work; I can't kept that up and maintain my job.) A lot of buried issues continued to be uncovered. The deception all around is unnerving, adding to the confusion of what to do, who to speak with. I'm sure I will require personal counseling to work through the anger I feel and hopefully find genuine forgiveness in my heart --- if only for my own peace of mind going forward and my (adult) child's sake.

This is all more challenging to manage at a physical distance. (At least it feels that way to me.) You have all been so supportive and have wonderful insight. I will be sure to let you know what develops. Thank you again.
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