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My mother’s nursing home records show she had Altered Mental Status, Cognitive deficits, stage 3a CKD, Metabolic encephalopathy & Urosepsis when her final Will was done in 2023.. My siblings & their spouses took advantage of my mother’s poor mental & physical health & changed her Will. This Will was not done by her attorney. It was done by a Notary outside the parish where she lived. All previous adjustments to her original Will were done by her Attorney. This Will excluded me as an heir to her estate. A previous Will done in 2018 by the same notary also excluded me as an heir. It was also done by my siblings when mom’s mental & physical health were failing. My BIL’s signature as a witness is on her final Will. I’m in the process of contesting the Will. My mother bequeathed to me a rosary & a mother of pearl Our Lady of Perpetual Help scapula on a chain. Based on my siblings behavior, I became suspicious of what I thought might happen to these 2 items. Well, I was right. I called the funeral home recently to ask if the rosary & scapula were buried w my mother. They were. I have 3 siblings. All are executors in the Will. The funeral home told me these items were placed in her casket right after the church service was over. Do I have any recourse besides executor misconduct? (I already know I can’t get them back) I’m in Louisiana.

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lsudvm91, a Court Order might be needed to unearth your mother's casket, depending on State laws. Plus permission from the other immediate heirs.


Once you get a Court Order, you need to notify the cemetery. The cemetery would contract their contractor, there would be a fee to open up the grave itself and equipment used to raise the casket. There would be a fee for this service.


The casket may need to be transported to another location to be opened because of State health issues, therefore a funeral home would need to be contacted for delivery, opening, and return on the casket, another fee. Upon return, the contractor called back to lower the casket into the grave. Don't know if a new coffin lining (a metal lining that is placed in the grave to which the coffin is placed inside) would be needed or not (depends on State laws), if yes, another fee.
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Reply to freqflyer
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This post is from April, OP has not posted since May,
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Reply to JoAnn29
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If you are very determined to get this one item and you’re sure it’s buried with her, you can inquire about unearthing her casket and then re-burying her. It will be expensive if it’s allowed but the only way to know is to call the funeral home/ cemetery where she is buried and ask. I’m sure they’ve been asked lots of various questions so they won’t be shocked; it might take them a few days to get back to you with an answer and a price if that’s possible. Hope that you’re doing well and my condolences to you.
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Reply to gemswinner12
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Louisiana has laws that protect the rights of heirs even if they have been excluded from the will. Contesting a will may be your legal avenue to protect your rights. You may find it helpful to contact an attorney who specializes in probate law in your state for advice and guidance regarding your situation.
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NeedHelpWithMom Apr 29, 2024
I live in Louisiana. At one point in time we had forced heirship. It was voted out in the 90’s.

The law stipulates that the OP would have to be under 24 years old with disabilities to be able to qualify for forced heirship.
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If you have no "plans to do anything legally", what CAN you do? The items are now buried. So short of having mother's body exhumed, which isn't an option, there is nothing you can do about this at all.

Perhaps your siblings weren't trying to be spiteful, just felt these items belonged with your mother for eternity. The one thing nobody can take from you is the memory of her.

Please allow peace in your heart and the lovely memories of mom to prevail now. My condolences on your loss.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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NeedHelpWithMom Apr 29, 2024
You’re exactly right, Lea. My sweet grandmother always had her rosary in her pocket.

My mother said that she couldn’t bear to separate her from her rosary and buried them with grandma.
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I’m so sorry that you don’t have these items that your mother wanted you to have.

Wishing you peace.
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Reply to NeedHelpWithMom
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I, too, would refrain from spending for a lawyer on this. He or she won’t be able to recover any more than market value for these irrecoverable items, and most claims only for emotional distress fail.

Buy replicas or updated items that you can pass on to your own descendants. No need to talk to this executors after that.
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lsudvm91 Apr 20, 2024
I don’t have any plans to do anything legally. The scapula is 60 years old. It is irreplaceable. Mom wore it on special occasions.
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That truly sucks. Sorry I can't say it better. Just <insert swear word>.

I think I would either try to have a replica piece made or treat myself to a lovely new item of jewellery to signify rememberce.
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Reply to Beatty
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Do you have a copy of the original version of the Will that bequeathed these items to you? If so, your attorney will need to see it. If you know you won't get the items back, but still want to legally hold your siblings liable for executor misconduct, do you have the funds to pay for this?
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Reply to Geaton777
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I’m sorry that in addition to your loss you’re having tension with your family about the estate.

As was already said, if you’re contesting the will then I assume an attorney is involved. If not, you need one. Two points in general: as I understand it – and I’m not a lawyer, this is just to improve the chances of a productive conversation with one— the fact that the newer will excluding you wasn’t done by an attorney doesn’t mean it’s invalid. Wills don’t have to be done by an attorney.

What catches my eye more is the fact that the brother-in-law was the witness. In general, though would depend on state law, the witnesses have to be “disinterested “. That means they can’t be beneficiaries, and at least one source here suggests they shouldn’t be related to beneficiaries either. )You didn’t actually say if the siblings received the estate or not, but if they did, this might be an important point to discuss with your lawyer).

https://www.freewill.com/learn/witness-requirements-who-can-witness-a-will

I’m not completely sure what you hope to gain – unfortunately you’re not going to be able to get those particular items back - but good luck in your efforts.
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Reply to Rumbletown
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You are in the process of contesting a will.
That would seem to indicate that you have an attorney.
I would discuss this question with your attorney.
Best of luck to you.
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