I need honest help on a live in matter.

In 2009 I started cleaning an elderly couples house. I quickly became acquainted. This couple has no children and their sisters live far away and elder themselves. Quickly I noticed the wife declining. Her fearing being put in an nursing home, I told her that I have 30+ yrs experience in elder care and I would care for her in her home. They agreed. I went from going every day to staying every night.. At the end of her life I was there 24/7 and she passed away in her home as she wanted. I told Mr J that I wouldn't leave him as while I care for his wife I also was taking care of him. He was paying me $1800 a month caring for his wife. I was helping them and they helping me. In the process I missed my kids teen years and was away from my husband a lot. I didn't just care for them, I mowed their 10 acres and helped in any way I could with this cars, shopping, bathing her, food prep, Dr visits, everything. About a year later I started caring for Mr J full time. I still do everything as if it were my home. He was paying me $1600 a month and I had another job. I was making several trips their a day. Then it got to where he wanted company and was scared of being alone at night so I was now spending most of my time there or here and my kids at home and husband at home. To my surprise Mr J was saying they had no one to inherit his home and his sisters wouldn't want it so he has left it to my husband and I. Very grateful. So after a while of continuous care I asked if we could just move in to the spare room and so I could be with my husband. By this time my kids are on their own. My son bought our home where he grew up. When this happened he stopped paying me. It was okay bc I was grateful and I had a job. Fast forward it got to the point that he wanted me there full time and so I quit my job to be here full time. I do step away to do errands but I'm constantly in a rush to get back, never having a day off. If I leave for the day or over night, I pay someone to watch him. When I quit my job, that was 3 yrs ago, I haven't been paid bc he feels I'm getting the house on 10 acres and he says he is leaving me the tractor and both cars. Again grateful but that isn't helping me now and I am not in need of his cars at this moment. So I have no income and technically the house isn't mine yet. I can't make changes bc he doesn't want me to. I can't have a pool, animals, I'd like to foster and can't. I have grandbabies and my kids that have no where to go when they come here. Mr J has full run of the house and we have 10x10 room that we are cramped in. I asked if the garage could be made a living room so we can have our space and he said no. I feel trapped and owned. I'm grateful I am but im still young and need a home now and a life. So he pays the electric and land taxes, 1/2 of groceries and 1/2 when I grab takeout. He is gracious and gives me a nice birthday and Christmas and he has paid off a bill or 2 for me. He bought a new AC and a new roof that was needed. He said he did it for us and I think he sees that as payment. And by the way yes the house and land has been legally documented and filed to us as trustees. I am also his legal health care surrogate and durable power of attorney. I've known him so long I see him as my dad and even if he told me today to leave I'd still care for him. I'd just like to know what is fair since we are getting his home, that by the way could be 10 more years! I'll be old myself. I thought about buying another place or staying in a camper to have our own space but we don't want to go into more debt because I don't have an income. I need to know should I be paid while living here? I know I'm saving him thousands by staying home and not in a nursing home. I kick butt to keep things perfect here for him from his home to the whole 10 acres to Dr visits, shopping, picking up meds to driving him 300 miles to family for the holidays. Please help, I just need some honest help. I'm going crazy and I'd like to know what to say.