My dad has sudden onset, multi-infarct dementia. It is as if he suddenly has no self-censoring. He is verbally abusive and won't "fall for" redirection.
I am moving him from his current home with my mother to live with me and my husband. How do I cope with this? When he becomes paranoid, sarcastic, and abusive toward me, my mom, or my husband and won't be redirected, what should I say?
Thanks very much for any help! It's as if Dad has suddenly turned into an abusive drunk, and I'm not sure how to handle this.
HIM HOME AS LONG AS CAN I HAVE TO MAKE HIM KEEP UP HIS HYGIENE ARE HE WON'T SHOWER OR SHAVE AND THAT IS BECOMING HARD TO DO SOMETIMES I HAVE TO BE VERY REPETITIVE WHEN I ASK HIM TO DO IT AND HE GETS ANGRY WHEN I KEEP ASKING HIM.SOMETIMES I JUST WANT TO SEND HIM AWAY BUT I KNOW THAT IS NOT THE RIGHT THING TO DO AT THIS POINT BUT I KNOW THAT EVENTUALLY I AM GOING TO HAVE TO MAKE THAT DECISION.
My mom is very relieved that he is coming to live here. She simply cannot manage him anymore on her own. The only alternative was a nursing home. And that remains our backup plan for when the time comes that my husband and I can no longer care for him.
I will take your advice and read all I can about dementia. Thanks again for your support.