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My Grandmother is in her 90's and lost her husband at a young age left with two young children. She never learned to drive. My father stayed around till he was in his late 40's before he moved our family 1000 miles away. My aunt was left to solely care for my Grandmother. She pretty much was the only one who my Grandma relied on as they lived only streets away and my grandma cared for my cousin daily from infant till 15 years of age. As my Grandma got older and failed in her health which she is doing really amazing my aunt forced her to sell her home. Moved Grandma in with her and her husband and took over all her bank accounts etc. My Grandmother is being severely mistreated in the mental capacity with constant fighting, financial theft and etc...She has called us crying day after day for years. Every time we try to get her to leave she agrees but then her daughter will come home and find out and tell her that if she goes she can never come back, she will no longer be her daughter, she will disown her, bla bla bla. and it terrifies my Grandmother. My Gram knows she needs to leave but she cant get the courage to leave the state and come with us (there is no family any closer for her to stay with). I am afraid if we go and get her that she will have a heart attack from the stress, and her death will be on our shoulders but I cant stand to see her suffer. What can we do?

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Yes I do know it is mental abuse. I have been on the telephone with her and she would be telling me something that happened and my Uncle will come in and start screaming at her Bloody murder , like an animal to quit thrashing his family that she is a liar and gets take care of like a queen and she should be grateful! I also have had others (elders) see the way she is treated as well as banking documents showing the financial side of the abuse. My gram has $$ in the bank... it is not a problem. Part of the problem is the financial abuse as well that is going on. things are not adding up and she has been blocked from her own financial documents until just recently when the financial abuse was revealed.There is no one left ion my family. My father and I who live in separate states as my gram. My father and I are both concerned but like I said, we are scarred to remove her in far that it might medically hurt her. I just need some advice how to coach her away from the only thing she knows......
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Are you ABSOLUTELY sure that your grandma is being abused? If she has any kind of dementia and is calling telling you how terrible it is, then that's a problem. Where are folks during this? How come it seems to be you that's worried? Is no one else concerned enough to take action? If your aunt was left to take care of her mother solely, then it is possible that financially it was too hard on her, and that's why the house had to go. I know you're worried, but you and I KNOW there's always 2 sides to every story. So if you're going to get strangers involved and report this as abuse, make sure you're ABSOLUTELY sure that what you're saying is gospel. Good luck.
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