My 96 year old mother in law broke her hip about 2 years ago. She made a pretty good recovery but has since been prone to falls. She has fortunately not suffered anymore fractures but the last time she fell she was using her cane. Since that time we have insisted that she use her walker. It seems like she is much less mobile and we’re wondering if using the walker is inhibiting her mobility. She is also showing signs of dementia and we are struggling with her nutrition since her appetite is very poor. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. We live in a rural area and many of the support systems aren’t available here.
A walker is a pain in the neck because they're always banging it into the doorways and furniture, but by design it requires them to use both hands to use it, and they have to be facing it to walk anywhere. The ones with wheels aren't good for anyone of your MIL's age -- they really should be for much younger folks. (My mother never could figure out the hand brakes, so we gave up on it, thank goodness.)
She's 96 and sounds like she's slowing down and heading for her eventual end. Let her eat what she wants, when she wants. Offer her a small breakfast, then a snack every couple of hours and see if you have better luck that way, but honestly, if she's not hungry, she's not hungry. I have a relative who lived to be 102 eating little more than fried chicken and Oreos the last 15 years of her life. If she hadn't, maybe she might have made it to 105, but why? She died with a smile on her face.
My father fought off the need for a cane until my DH brought him to Walgreens and told him to pick one out, he'd wait. Then came the need for a walker, which he refused, of course, and wound up falling & breaking a hip which led to his death 10 months later. His mobility was compromised, as is my mother's, for a long time before he actually admitted it.
When I had a full hip replacement in 2017, I used a walker with no problem or resistance at all. I saw that it helped me, that I needed it, and it was there to assist me in getting back on my feet independently. Of course, I wasn't suffering dementia either, to the best of my knowledge, so my brain power wasn't compromised.
My mother's favorite saying is "It's a great life if you don't weaken." Your MIL probably hates admitting that she has a 'weakness' that requires her to use a walker. If so, she's sitting around more than usual as a result.
You might want to look into getting some Ensure or Boost shakes for her if she's suffering from a poor appetite. Or make her some smoothies yourself in the blender. Sometimes the elders prefer something they can drink rather than chew, especially if it tastes sweet (dementia gives them a HUGE sweet tooth). Keep in mind that a sedentary human being requires far fewer calories than we THINK they do to survive. So don't worry too much if she's not eating as much as you feel she should be eating. A few bites at each meal, supplemented with a snack here and there, should do the trick. Experiment to see which foods she seems to enjoy, and eliminate the ones she makes a face at and won't eat. No use in arguing such a thing at this stage of the game. In fact, I bring a couple of bags of junk food to my mother in the ALF every Sunday when we go for a window visit. She says she hates the food they serve her (she's gained 40 lbs, however) so she can supplement her diet with her favorites snacks. She'll be 94 in January; it's up to HER now what she eats or doesn't eat.
I think you should allow your MIL, at 96, to be less mobile if that's what she seems to want. Don't push for her to be active; it makes no sense, really. She's earned the right to do as she pleases and besides, with dementia, you can't really argue with them....it's impossible! It only gives YOU heartburn and becomes a losing battle.
Good luck!!!
I am writing from the patients perspective. I was diagnosed with a form of Muscular Dystrophy at the age of 40 where in between age circa 8-40 I was told there was nothing the matter with me. Finally on my 40th birthday, I was told I had M.D. My Ortho doctor recommended I get a walker to use on days when walking was difficult, inclement weather, or very long distance. He told me not to be using it everyday, but if I needed it use it. That was 21 years ago and rarely have I used the walker, but I've not been shy about using it especially when traveling and walking in unfamiliar locations.
Four years ago I was diagnosed with early onset ALZ and I use the walker more often. I have suffered a handful of falls in the last year, no major injuries, but I am now less stable. I'd think a very senior citizen, should use the walker for their own safety. I hope if I begin to rebel against using it as I further decline, that my family will insist upon me using it for my own safety. I hope this is helpful.
Take care.
It’s tricky to know what is the best thing. My mom would like nothing more than to sit in a wheelchair because it is absolutely exhausting for her to walk just a short distance.
When I spoke to her doctor about her wanting to be in a wheelchair he was adamant that she should continue to walk.
She’s well into her 90’s and still going but every step is painful. So who knows how long a person can push themselves? It’s so hard to know.
My mom continually said that the doctor did not know the pain and fatigue that she felt. She had a point. It made me feel awful for her every time I would hear her say it.
Parkinson’s is a dreadful progressive disease. There isn’t a cure. Those who suffer with it will never improve. Many eventually end up in wheelchairs. I think that has to be an extremely difficult challenge to care to a person in a wheelchair.
If she can still learn new things a walker with wheels should be fine. Once she learns the brakes and internalizes that it should be automatic.
I am not an expert!
They do have to continue the exercises after the sessions end. Unfortunately, my mom wouldn’t do as much on her own and would regress.