Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I read a lot of posts by women who are at the end of their rope taking care of spouses who are difficult to take care of. I wonder what keeps them motivated taking care of someone who has a host of behavioral issues.
It could be a lot of these women do not believe in divorce. Either because they know God would not let them divorce, or because they were born at a time when divorced was frowned upon in society, or both. They can live separately, but cannot separate what God has joined. Sadly, a lot of guys change after marriage and misuse their status as head of household because they know the woman is not free to walk like when not married.
The key here is " a lot of guys change after marriage". And as such, you should be able to divorce them. They are not the men you traded vows with. He is to cherish you as much as you cherish him.
I am divorced after a 5 yr marriage that I ended up feeling like a slave and he committed adultery. A year after my divorce I married a good man that I feel God put into my path. He has stood beside me thru thick and thin. How could this marriage not be blessed.
Is there any chance Medicaid would look at such a divorce as being a means of transferring/hiding assets (assuming the divorce takes place within 5 years of needing Medicaid)?
Hi Bob, Long time no correspondence. Yes, you are correct according to our Estate Attorney, however, if you divorce, divide property and no longer live together, you'd be safe in the state of VA. We were told the way it would look like you were shielding assets would be if you continued to live together. We decided that we'd throw the dice for the 5 yr look-back, on the Trust, and no longer buy anything as Joint-Owners. I now jokingly, refer to myself as a tenant in her house. We know how to keep our sense of humor. I hope the New Year is off to a good start for you. We're down to 104 days until our Alaska Cruise.
My mom has end-stage Alzheimer's and I've been caring for her over 10 years. She is now at the very end stages of it. Her condition has crippled me both financially and emotionally..as severe worry, anxiety and depression are my constant companions... but I love my mom more than life itself. So I don't mind caring for her. She deserves to live in the comfort and familiarity of her own home that I would never even consider a nursing home. When she dies I do not know how I will cope, but since I wake up in the morning and still breathe looks like I will have to. It's a sink or swim life.
As for marriage..the vows say for better or worse..in sickness and in health. maybe these women who stay married to someone with Alzheimer's loves their spouse. However, due to reasons similar to insanity, a lawyer would have to Petition the Court for a Divorce decree. STATE laws vary how this is done. https://www.familydivorcelaw.com/kane-county-divorce-attorney/divorce-when-a-spouse-has-dementia
Well, here is a perhaps cold but practical advise for everyone out there about to go on a long Carers journey. Get divorced. Do it together while the person who will need care still is cabable of making rational decisions That way the care expenses only comes out of their assets and income and, having less opens up a lot more government paid services. You keep all your money for your needs and old age you can still live under the same roof and still get their POA to make sure the right decisions and care is given to them. Use the system to both your advantages
I don't think this is cold. Its becoming a reality. More woman have joined the workforce in the last 50 yrs. Why shouldn't they protect what they have worked for.
demstress, usually if a spouse has Alzheimer's, that spouse would still need to be able to understand the legal documents for a divorce. If the spouse is unable, then one needs to seek other means of the spouse being care for.... such as memory care or a nursing home. Thus, divorce is not reachable.
When the behavior gets too much some opt for an AL or LTC if they can't afford a AL. You then apply for Medicaid.
As a "Community" spouse you will not become impoverished. Your living expenses are considered. The example I give is my GFs parents. Dad needed LTC. They had 60k in savings plus SS and pension. The 60k was split between her parents. The mother stayed in the house, had her car. Not sure how they split up the SS or pension but Mrs. R never seemed to have any problems money wise. Oh, his half of the 30k had to be spent down before Medicaid took over.
Divorce? You may want to talk to a lawyer to see what your best options are. One versed in Medicaid. I would think DH would become a ward of the state if you divorce. You will have no say in his care.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Sadly, a lot of guys change after marriage and misuse their status as head of household because they know the woman is not free to walk like when not married.
I am divorced after a 5 yr marriage that I ended up feeling like a slave and he committed adultery. A year after my divorce I married a good man that I feel God put into my path. He has stood beside me thru thick and thin. How could this marriage not be blessed.
Long time no correspondence. Yes, you are correct according to our Estate Attorney, however, if you divorce, divide property and no longer live together, you'd be safe in the state of VA. We were told the way it would look like you were shielding assets would be if you continued to live together. We decided that we'd throw the dice for the 5 yr look-back, on the Trust, and no longer buy anything as Joint-Owners. I now jokingly, refer to myself as a tenant in her house. We know how to keep our sense of humor.
I hope the New Year is off to a good start for you. We're down to 104 days until our Alaska Cruise.
As for marriage..the vows say for better or worse..in sickness and in health. maybe these women who stay married to someone with Alzheimer's loves their spouse. However, due to reasons similar to insanity, a lawyer would have to Petition the Court for a Divorce decree. STATE laws vary how this is done. https://www.familydivorcelaw.com/kane-county-divorce-attorney/divorce-when-a-spouse-has-dementia
That way the care expenses only comes out of their assets and income and, having less opens up a lot more government paid services. You keep all your money for your needs and old age
you can still live under the same roof and still get their POA to make sure the right decisions and care is given to them. Use the system to both your advantages
As a "Community" spouse you will not become impoverished. Your living expenses are considered. The example I give is my GFs parents. Dad needed LTC. They had 60k in savings plus SS and pension. The 60k was split between her parents. The mother stayed in the house, had her car. Not sure how they split up the SS or pension but Mrs. R never seemed to have any problems money wise. Oh, his half of the 30k had to be spent down before Medicaid took over.
Divorce? You may want to talk to a lawyer to see what your best options are. One versed in Medicaid. I would think DH would become a ward of the state if you divorce. You will have no say in his care.