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Thanks Margaret ,

DH literally told them all in a text when we put FIL in hospice , that he had been declining much more rapidly the past couple of months with CHF , COPD , and Cachexia . And now has come down with Covid and will not survive . He was only on hospice about 36 hours before death .

I don’t know what else they really needed . At almost 90 , considering all these issues I think the writing was on the wall.
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The chances of them writing are very very low, and if so you can work out then how to brush it off. xxx
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Way,

It must be a great relief to you and your husband now that your FIL has passed.

You don't have to answer any questions or take one second of crap from family, friends, fish or fowl. You and your husband need to tell them all to step off inculding and most of all the nosey vulture of a step-daughter. Tell her if she's inheriting anything you'll let her know when your FIL's will is filed and his estate (if there is one) gets settled. Other than this if she or anyone else gets obnoxious with their inquisitiveness, you know how to hang up a phone or not answer a door.

I wish you and your husband peace and healing in your time of grief.
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(((((way))) and hugs to dh. I have a sis who tried to bully me - she didn't get very far. I stopped giving her any information. I let her know when mother had passed. That was it. Once the estate was settled, and the lawyer was the go between for us, I cut contact. She has tried to keep a relationship going but I have not responded.

I think what they really want is to bug you/dh. As you say, the writing about his condition was on the wall.

I like Margaret's suggestion - not now and write me. Dh could resend what he sent before, if he responds at all. He really doesn't need to answer any of their questions. That information could be considered to be private. If fil had wanted to appoint any of them to be his POA and to care for him he could have.
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