My mom lives in a nearby state. She's 77 years old and still works. She says she wants to stay in the small house that she lives in now and doesn't want to retire just yet or move into assisted living. Problem: She really cannot take care of things anymore. Her house is a mess and I get calls from my sister-in-law saying that my mom is living in "squalor." My mom has never been the best house keeper, but it is getting worse. She let the backyard get so over grown that now it will have to be handled by a special company to cut back the overgrowth. It looks like a jungle. My mom says she doesn't want to move; she has two dogs and a cat. I've asked her to come live with me which would entail me getting a new place; currently I live on the second floor of an apartment building. I've very concerned that if I don't get her to come live with me that she'll be forced to live some place that she doesn't want to live. It's very confusing and hard to deal with from another state. My siblings that live there don't want to get involved and my sister-in-law acts mad about it all. It's overwhelming. I'm not in a position to swoop down and throw a lot of money at this situation. I just want to do the right thing by my mom no matter how secretive and eccentric she is. Any advice?
Speaking from experience, you probably don't want your mom living with you until it is absolutely necessary. I to understand your concern for your mom. You are a good daughter.