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If I am not around for a while it is because my partner of 37 years has had a stroke. Happened last night. Am with family. We got him to the Hospital right away by ambulance and clot busters were given right away. Was in the MCA at M-1 branch. Knocked out his left side, so was a right sided stroke. Slurred speech and no swallow. Clot large and visible on scan. They were taking him for a procedure in cath lab to remove the clot when the busters disintegrated it and everything came back, speech and movement. Just a tiny vision blank in outer left eye. He will be touch and go to hope he doesn't bleed with the clot busters, and they can be tough on kidneys. At 84 he's no kid so he's in neuro-intensive. I will update here as this goes along.This is, of course, what all we elders lie in bed fearing will happen to one of the other of us. And it did. My DIL says "See, you TOLD us so....".
AS TO STROKES please listen to me now:No waiting around. It is 911 immediately to the ER. Addressing it with clot busters can leave you good as new and ignoring it can leave you in the nursing home. Your best change at quality life is to get to the ER as fast as you can. Never ignore symptoms of a stoke.

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I'm so glad he is doing so well.

Your PTSD and reliving the stuff , will take time, I'm sure you know.
When I thought my husband was dead for 3 hours, being lost in New Orleans, I needed him in my seeing view for a long time. Then if he went to the store to long, if he bumped into someone, for a chat, and didn't have his cell phone with him, I'd loose it. Now he is somewhat getting use to bringing his cell with him, and I test him him on my cell number so he knows it by heart.

But it will get better where you won't worry so much.

I think I'm getting him a dog tag, on are next trip, lol that way he will at least have my number with him.
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AnxietyNacy,
Thanks, recovery seems COMPLETE. Supposedly just over 10% recover COMPLETELY even when they get there FAST and get the clot busters FAST. Many still have deficits.
Neil does NOT. He saw the doc and he is to go on as though this never happened with minor changes in his drugs, and with replacing his baby aspirin now he is in chronic atrial fib (was in and out, which they say can be WORSE, actually) with Pradaxa (that one and eliquis work the same. They don't thin the blood but rather they stop clot formation by little pacmen that come along and eat the fibrin that forms clots. All's well unless someone attempts to stab him to death? Because his blood won't clot great).

So that is apparently it. I can tell you that seeing him unable to move anything but his right side minimally, and all garbled in the speech and confused last Thursday evening to seeing him for all intent and purposes as tho it NEVER HAPPENED is a picture in surrealism. As a nurse I never saw a recovery like this. EVER! I can't quite grasp it. I keep thinking he should not walk the dog alone, should not drive, all this stuff, and I am told to "leave him be and do life as normal". BIZARRE for this old nurse. I do the BP/pulse in the morning. And I try to shut up (NEVER EASY FOR ME).

So for myself, this thread is done. For now? It is scary. I'll own that.
But on we go.
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Prayers to you and your partner, AlvaDeer!!
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Hi Alva, just wondering how Neils recovery going, and how are you both doing, after the trauma set in?
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Alva, sorry I missed the initial post but I'm so glad your SO made it through. What a scary experience to go through, and like you said, so glad he was able to get the meds to take care of the clots in time. As you say, at 84 there's no harm living a more relaxed, slow-paced way of life. It's better to keep junk out of your diet like processed food and sugar anyway. Will Niel get scans to be sure the clots aren't hiding out anywhere else?

I saw your post on fostering and I think fosters are great. You can really know an animal in a home setting and like you said have the dog of a pet without ownership. Many rescues will pay vet care for fosters.
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Graygrammie, we DO have mobile vets and one we work with very closely. I think he would take us on if we called and begged. Our rescue has worked closely with him. It is overall unwise for us in early 80s to take on a new animal, and we know it. Is is leaving problems to/for your kids and or others. Fostering keeps us "in animals" while we place them hopefully in great homes. We will see on this one. She is listed and for a chi mix in this city with the number of "problems" she has there is little interest. We will let the fates decide it. For a potential adopter willing to adopt her problems for a big fee, ha ha, one we APPROVE as a great home? Upside, we still get to baby sit (free of course) when folks travel, and she has a great home. Downside we lose her and go on to another, and after many years of fostering that is something we are quite adapted to. Time will tell the story on this one and we are allowing for that. As of now she is using the vets of the Foster Organization, so she's covered.
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AlvaDeer, you said there are few vets in the Bay Area. What about mobile vets? Yes, you pay more, but they come to your house. Also, wouldn't the organization that you foster dogs for have vets? I think they would share their vet for someone that has fostered as many as you two have.
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CX:
The update? "You are one lucky man; must have been quite a week". Needless to say they are quite amazed and seems no medical has anything to say but "He got there RIGHT AWAY; that's the key". He tests totally normal. Started on pradaxa, Kaiser's better answer to Eliquis; it acts the same, eating up the fibrin in any clots it finds. Means you better hold pressure after those blood draws. It doesn't let your blood clot. Not a good time to be a stabbing victim.

He is to resume EVERYTHING in his normal life and given low pressure, very slender, low cholesterol, and ONLY the atrial fib as the one thing that predisposes him to stroke, he is to think of this as perhaps a 1 x thing and resume life as he knows it. He is currently walking Frieda out alone; and I must let him.
And when you think of it, at 84? What's to be lost by NOT doing it that way. I will have to give up being afraid for him. I believed he was leaving me and I recall calmly saying to myself "this is where I lose Neil and this is where life as I know it changes forever."
I mean we both have known for years that at some point some THING......etc. One of us WILL leave the other. And I know more surely than anything now that he was ready to leave and I could have let him do so--but the thought of a nursing home and the results of a bad stroke? Our idea of a hell on earth.

Gershun, if god's a "believer" there's no stopping it becaue I think we either have the belief gene or not. I don't. If God does I am glad for any gifts he has thrown my way. I have had an enormous number of gifts in my life, and for each I am enormously grateful. Just not certain to WHOM? I love churches, hymns, pomp, cathedrals, cemeteries, prayers, the poetry of the bible, the Saints and know them all and their stories. I mean I would have made the BEST DANGED CATHOLIC were it not for my unbelief. And who could see Audrey Hepburn in A Nun's Story and not want to be one; I sure did. And wanted to look like her as well.

Like I always say, my atheism isn't a life CHOICE. It's just that I never believed. Go figure? I sure can't. But in 82 years, and much as I pretend otherwise, I don't have the answers to too much.
Thanks again to all for all the good support and loving kindness and gentle caring.
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Alva, God moves in mysterious ways. You may not believe in him
but he believes in you.
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Alva,
Give us an update when you can, following today's appt.

Praying for your mind and body to feel God's peace that passes understanding. We don't need you wiping out! ◡̈
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Coumadin causes internal bleeding after long usage. My Dad had to be taken off of it because of this.
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Neil is so very fortunate to have his Nurse Ratchet! Thanks for your thoughts. My mother was the opposite of proactive, did not take the ambulance route. That’s a good explanation of the likely reason for no clot busting med. And yes, we all blame Coumadin for the hemorrhagic stroke. Hope all goes great today at follow-up appointment
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@daughter1930 : I hate the blood thinners, and that last stroke for your mom, that was hemorrhagic, was likely a side effect of the coumadin if she was on it. It is almost impossible as strokes can be either clot or hemorrhage, and each treated differently.

In order to get t-PA or the other "clot busters " you have to be in the hospital and getting it within hopefully two to four hours of your "incident". Now they say may work at 6 hours and give it, and if they actually have a clot that will visualize on the CT scan which must be done BEFORE the administration of clot busters, they may choose to try to go in and grab it by stringing in their catheters from groin to brain to grab it.

Most teaching hospitals of any size are stroke centers, but here in SF we have only THREE. General, Pacific and UCSF (university hospital). Had Neil been taken not by 911, left to sit a bit in an ER, and not taken by ambulance to stroke center (which isn't out usual Kaiser) and directly into cubicle, then directly to CT scan machine, then we would not have been "in time" for the clot busters.

But if your Mom was in by ambulance, to a hospital with a "stroke center", and into the cubicle, into the CT scanner, I don't understand why she didn't get the clot buster. For Neil it was looking not to work and they were preparing to do the embolectomy when suddenly, during prepping him, he came completely around. It works by an enzymatic action of going to the clot, "eating it up--it's fibrin" and destroying it. And he was lucky in that it did work for him. But it was all miraculously fast action.

We are just feeling a bit shocky. Off today to Kaiser for followup first time with their MD who will "follow him". We are kind of PTSD in some sense, but holding! And feeling so incredibly lucky. We are both atheists. We seem to have no gene for belief. Not a choice, just a fact, but sometimes our language only has so many words, and this does feel to us a bit "miraculous".
During the whole thing he didn't want to really be treated. Was in la la land mumbling away and "ready to go" and I told him "I will let you GO, if I HAVE to, but I won't let you sit mumbling in a nursing home for another few years if I can prevent it! You WILL have this procedure (embolectomy). Hee hee, Nurse Rachet drops the hatchet.

We are hopeful. We are PTSD'd a bit, and we are scared. It's hard to wrap your head around. I am afraid to let him out of my site. And oh, man, my stomach and bowel are SUCH a mess.
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Alva, when I wake in the mornings, I try to think of happy thoughts, this morning I thought of you and Neil. 🙂‍↕️
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Alva, apologies for being so late to the party here. I’m soooo glad to read of an excellent outcome! It is indeed miraculous. To go from so much fear after witnessing all that damage to being home as normal petting that lucky dog, just wow!
As anyone who reads here much has seen me saw on about, my mom had four strokes we know about, likely more we didn’t. She’d long death with high BP. The first three were from clots and none of those times, none, did she receive the clot busting med. I will live the rest of my days never knowing why, I wasn’t directly there for any of them, but it never made sense to me. She was sent home on the much hated Coumadin with no other real follow-up. This wasn’t in a rural setting, but a city of 350k with a “teaching” university hospital. We weren’t told anything, couldn’t understand her new apathy. We now know it was depression that so often comes after a stroke, but it was never mentioned. The fourth stroke was hemorrhagic and took every physical ability. It would have been far kind if she’d died. I so appreciate your inclusion of instructions and tips for all of us. How wise of you. I’m now the daughter desperately trying not to repeat the pattern. My doctor watches my BP and advises me to keep my weight down, I take both seriously.
I’m so glad for you and your beloved, getting this great news and chance at life again. Enjoy every day!
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I’m so glad things are looking up!
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I will update anything else here, otherwise allowing this thread to fade far into the past, I hope. We see regular Kaiser MD tomorrow to just see how we keep an eye on things and what the medication changes will be over time. And on we go. If we continue to try to place Frieda it will be under the heading "Lifesaver Dog". But I am uncertain if he will give her up now. He had dawdled for a year at best. At 82 and 84 and with the uncertainties of our lives just proven, with access to vets in Bay Area almost nil, we understand this isn't something we should be doing. So time will tell.
Thank you ALL for your encouragement, love, thoughts, prayers, wishes. You are an amazing community of VERY GOOD PEOPLE.
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Thank you for your words of wisdom and encouragement to call 911.
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Yes Alva, God is a lover of all of His creatures. He's good like that, and I do hope that there are many more dogs in Neil's life.
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Sorry I missed this earlier, glad to see he’s doing better Alva!
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Wow, Alva!

Such great news!

May God give you many more years together!
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Funky, it quite tickles me to think that if there's a god then perhaps he has about a DOZEN more dogs to throw Neil's way; god knows his photo album is FULL of dogs he has placed over many years, so many that the dogs in many cases have died of old age.
God must be a dog lover!
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All I can say is WOW!!! If that isn't a miracle I don't know what is.
God apparently isn't done with Neil yet. I will continue to keep you both lifted up in prayer.
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So sorry to hear this. Sending you healing thoughts…
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Bless God for His mercies. He does still perform miracles and answer prayers. I was cured of a 5 year gut yeast infection in moments by prayer. So happy for you and Neil and thanks for the urging re calling 911.
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Miracles DO happen Alva, and you just witnessed one with Neil. Enjoy your day with him and with Frieda.
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Alva, 😢☺️ 😍, I'm speechless, and just so relieved for you!!
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@Alva

I am so happy for you and Neil. It's a miracle.
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@Burnt: Re your comment: When Neil was looking as tho the clot buster didn't work and they were wanting to do the embolectomy to go in and try to fish out that very visible clot--he was refusing. Said let him go. And I was over him in no uncertain terms telling him "I will let you GO, but you aren't going anywhere but to the nursing home with no left side, no speech and no swallow for the rest of your life, because you won't DIE of this, but you will live impaired". He then said YES. As they were prepping him for the procedure, didn't that clot explode and was gone with no deficits from the clot buster drugs.

Readers, he is HOME. Neither of us can believe it and are more or less in shock. Followup begins tomorrow with appt with his Kaiser MD, but he is looking like it never ever happened, and seeing him almost dead on the Bed Thursday night, unable to move, and with a flaccid left arm and leg, neglect on left side, garbled up speech, confused--this seems miraculous (if you will forgive the atheist's expression when there seems no other). He has dodged a bullet in a way neither of us can imagine. I saw lots of stroke recovery, but never one this full. The clot was apparently sitting above the carotids at branch M1 of the MCA (which has pretty pictures online) and had not moved in to cut off flow to any portion of the brain, nor blocked that main artery completely. Just sitting there. During prep for embolectomy (thinking clot to big to bust from drugs) it did bust. Followup CT is totally normal. And HE is completely normal.
We both were in bed at 7 pm. We look and act like shock victims.
Frieda the dog was so happy to see him come in in hospital clothes, she was spinning and couldn't get her breathe. Then she was smelling all the IV wounds and bruises, rubbing any spot he left just to get his smell on her. I think the little thing is somewhat attached? What say you.

AGAIN, please all take this as warning for if it saves one of you...........just know CALL 911. YOU CANNOT WAIT. You have a window of 2-4 (6 max) hours to get the clot busters in. You must be by that time at a stroke center and have had a CT Scan. So no calling cousin Irma to drive you to ER where you will sit until you are dead, OK. It is 911. They know which stroke center can take you and they will know you are having a stroke. Most of us can't imagine calling them. But believe me, when you see someone you love having symptoms of a stoke, you WILL BE ABLE TO MAKE THAT CALL. Please do. You cannot delay. Neil couldn't even sit up or move, so knew right away that SIL saying "I will drive you right to Kaiser ER" wasn't good. Turns out they are not the best stroke center and were on divert anyway. Would have meant permanent debility. Happily Neil couldn't move or talk well enough to say "OK".
Just know two things. Call 911. Time is of the essence.
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It’s very fortunate that with your experience, you recognized what was happening and took action.
Thank you for sharing your experience and advice so openly..
i know I, for one, will take it to heart and remember it!
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